My Hectic Triplet Pregnancy Journey

Life is moving so fast...!

2011-03-28T08:34:00.000-07:00

Hello.

It is amazing how quickly time passes. The holiday came and went, new year came and went, and now it is already close to the end of March.

Triplets are getting smarter, funnier, and crazier every day. Now, they are enjoying counting, sorting, coloring, running, and playing together. They are mischievous for sure. I wonder if they are feeling so empowered to do everything because they have each other.

Here are the photos from last several weeks....

Lesson 1: Never leave a big bottle of maple syrup on the dining table with triplets. It will be gone in a second.

Lesson 2: Check to see what they are up to if they are somewhat quiet in a bathroom. Never leave several body soap in a bathroom drawer. It will be gone in a second.

Lesson 3: Go to a bathroom very quickly. Otherwise, they get a chance, and try to get candies from upper kitchen cabinet by the time you are back.

Here is a cute photo of Aya, trying to create toe shoes.

I will try to update my blog more often to capture the moment.

3 years and... and... how old? I guess 3 years and 4 months old

2010-11-17T21:50:00.000-08:00

I don't know if anyone follows this blog, but once in a while, when I have a slight moment to sit down, I remember about this blog. Oh... I had such an experience of giving birth to triplets, and now I am in full motion raising them.

The time from 1 year and 4 months old, until they were 2 years and 9 months was the toughest so far. There were lots of climbing onto everything, from kitchen counters and cribs, bolting from me in public places, and escaping from high chairs, car seats, and a stroller... It was absolutely tiring...

until one day... around when 3 months before their 3rd birthday... they started telling me reasons NOT to do climbing, bolting, and escaping. They still did everything anyway, but at least they understood that they were doing something that they were not allowed, or not supposed to do.

Great progress with their cognitive ability!

Now, they are doing much better with listening. They still like to run around, away from me, but at least they don't bolt like before. I can hold their hands and walk in a public parking lot! No more stroller!!!

Pretty amazing?? Isn't it??

Here are how they look like.

Aya: She is a passionate woman. If you open your arms, she will come and jump into your arms, in full power. She still has the strongest will and belief that she can do everything that mom does, and she still gets frustrated because her mom does not let her cook dinner, bake toast, or open up a vitamin bottle and get vitamin gummies by herself. However, she is a loving girl, who loves to dance, draw, and cut up any paper she can get her hands on.

** Photo - Aya on the right, Naoto on the left, trying to drink water **

Naoto: He is a comedian by nature. Either intentionally or unintentionally, he does things which make us laugh. He is a caring brother to his sisters too, making sure that he picks the right clothes for the girls in the morning, (and unfortunately, often rejected by them, as his taste and their tastes may not match sometimes.) He loves to be on mom's back a lot, and he loves to talk too. He loves a superhero Ultraman (a very popular Japanese superhero). He is wearing an Ultraman costume whenever he can, and pretend to defeat me by hand beams.

**Photo: Kai, practicing his saxophone, and everyone else, joining it,
with harmonicas, pretending that they are in a band.
from the left to the right, Naoto, Aya, Tomo, Koto, and Kai**

Koto: Koto is an independent girl, who loves to be in her own world, doing puzzles. As soon as she wakes up, she usually heads out to our shelf with puzzles, and start working. She can complete puzzles up to 68 pieces. She is also very observant. Although she is tiny, compare to Aya, she acts more like a boss to everyone, reminding them what they are supposed to do or not to do. She does not get so much influenced by what others are doing at times, but often find things to do on her own. However, once her wants are not granted, oh my girl... she is the one who can protest the longest. She has a strong attachment to her special blanket, which used to be Kai's blanket (so it is 12 years old now!) Its discoloration and deterioration in its shape does not bother her. Her devotion to it is so strong, that it is a night time routine for us to look for THAT blanket for her to sleep with. (Otherwise... be prepared for a lengthy cry overnight.) She also loves to dance, and often Aya and Koto are doing a dance session... on the middle platform of our TV entertainment center.

Crazy life? Yes. Loving it? Sort of. Worth living in it? Yes!

Now,,, two and 7 months old!

2010-03-02T22:07:00.000-08:00

I cannot believe how long I have not yet updated this site. That tells me how busy I have been.

I will try to describe kids in short sentences.

Kai: Doing great! He enjoys being a 5th grader. In two months, he will be two years off chemotherapy treatment. My heart aches and tingles whenever I count how long he has been leukemia-free. I wish it continues so forever.

Tomo: He is in the first grade now. He is quite a smart kid, especially in Math. He matured socially too, and finally,,, he is enjoying the school! He still likes lots of computer games, but he had started enjoying reading too.

Photo: Left: Kai, Right: Tomo, being silly at Tahoe

And,,, triplets,,, gosh,,,.

They have grown so much since the last time I updated the blog. They talk a lot now, both in Japanese and in English. While their speaking is not that yet complete or smooth, they certainly communicate well with everybody now. They love to sing and dance, and,,, still,,, Aya and Koto love climbing. Especially, Aya is a busy girl. She loves to explore, is fearless, capable of climbing anywhere, and opening any locks and latches. With her strong will,,, that sometimes creates a problem with safety. I don't know how many times I was notified by Aya with a door bell at our front door that she unlocked our entrance door and got outside. At least she rings a bell,,, so that is good but it is extremely scary and honestly speaking,,, stressful to keep her (and as a consequence, Koto and Naoto) safe.

I am still somewhat forcing them to take a nap, by reading the three billy goats story, and telling them that I am so scared of troll that I have to pretend that I am napping, and they have to help me do so by copying me. Then they all fall asleep,,,. Once the three billy goats story no longer works, I will use three piggies and a scary wolf, and after that, the wolf and the seven little goats from the grimm tale.

Photo: Aya, putting lots of post-it on her mouth. She loves being silly too.

Photo: Koto, hiding in between bookshelves. She is the most independent, emotionally stable person. She loves playing with play-dough, puzzles, trains, etc.

Photo: Naoto, loving vacuuming. He is very animated, and his every action brings smile to our face. He loves to clean the house, and he loves to make sure that all the childproof latches are closed.

Here is the most recent video clip of the kids, playing cho-cho train. Aya g
smashed into the wall but she never cried and continued playing.

2 years old!

2009-07-26T23:05:00.000-07:00

Well,,, it is a day early, but they will be two years old tomorrow.

I appreciate the fact that they are all healthy. The last time they got sick was February, (I think,,, if my memory is correct) due to Rota virus, but they have not had fever or anything for a long time. That is the best gift for me from them.

They have been talking both in Japanese and in English, and they are very active toddlers! When I take them to the park, I am running everywhere, and still, someone manages to find a moment to open up the park gate and escape! I have to run like a wind to get him/her/them. They are very communicative too, so it is getting more and more fun to talk to them.

I wonder what our next one year will be like, but I hope they remain happy and fun.

Here is Aya, talking to me in Japanese (and also in English) through a crib tent hole.

Here is Koto, talking to me, telling me that she needs to change her diaper.

Here is Naoto, just trying to wake up from his nap.

After waking up from the nap, Koto then gets out from the crib while still in a sleep sack.

Then,,, Aya does the same,,,.

Naoto is not that good at climbing out of the crib, but we know he can do it, because we find him out of the crib in the morning. However, he has not yet shown to us how he does it in front of us. I wonder he is hiding his true ability,,,.

But he is great with spending time in his own crib, singing. We can listen to his singing through the baby monitor for a long long time before he finally falls asleep.

Living with the next generation athletes (and their manager)

2009-06-15T00:28:00.000-07:00

I never thought she would do it, but Aya, today, showed me that she can not only climb over the KidCo gates, which is 30 inches tall, she also showed us proudly that she can climb over Summer Infant extra tall baby gate, which is 36 inches tall. She is not yet 2 years old. The fact that Aya can do it means that Koto can soon do the same.

All day today, they enjoyed the feeling of liberation. The "thing" which used to block them from reaching to legos, pens, scissors, and this funny metal thing, to which their mom and dad, and sometimes brothers, tap their fingers onto and get moving pictures (ANA computers), are suddenly within reach. Whenever they climb over the gates, mom says "No no!" but does that mean "On on!" ??? Mom, you are spelling back words.

And why do you seem so disappointed and worried, mom? Is it because you spent days and night, putting total of 18 panels of configure gates, two elongates with extensions, and five doorway gates, but we are climbing over all of them? But mom,,, we are not falling! We just wanted to show you how athletic we are! See, see?? Don't worry! We will be OK (but your computer may not be,,,. We love pretending to be typing to it.)

We have so many questions to you though. Why did you start putting our sleep sacks backward? You took away our favorite activity, stripping ourselves naked and peeing in the cribs! Not fair,,,,. Also,,, I heard some noise while we were napping today. I suspect that you replaced the buckles of the stroller, thinking Aya can no longer unbuckle it. Well,,, let her try it tomorrow, and see if she indeed cannot unbuckle it. (But they don't know that mom also sawed the strings just above the buckles, so I can even tie their shoulder straps, hoping that Aya cannot escape.)

Well,,, although we cannot quite talk clearly yet, we can do so many things! We know that you still have not yet been able to replace the buckles of the car seats, right? Ha, ha, ha. I knew it because you let us play with the new buckles today. That means you still need to twist the car seat belts, and buckle it up for Aya, so she will not push down the chest buckle and squeeze out of the car seat, but then you will have to leave Koto and Naoto inside the gate in side the house, but hey,,, I (Koto) can get out of the KidCo gate, remember? That is why you found me sitting on top of your lap top and eating rice crackers the other day, while you were buckling up Aya to the car seat, who demonstrated great struggle.

And you still have to tie Koto's car seat buckle with Japanese Furoshiki cloth (big square piece of fabric), make knots around the buckle, and give her a long lecture that it is not safe to unbuckle it while driving. For that part, I (Koto) started to understand it a little better. See, I am listening to at least one order that you gave me!

But watch out for Naoto. He seems so innocent and harmless, he also silently unbuckles car seat buckle when you were scolding Koto. He is sneaky,,,,.

------

But they still do not know that mom is going to replace some gates to even higher ones, now,,, to 42 inches tall.

Now, I call Aya and Koto the next generation athletes, and Naoto, who loves taking care of others, will be their manager.

Aya the climber

2009-06-07T22:20:00.000-07:00

This video clip was taken about a month ago, when Aya was 21 months old. The kitchen cabinet is 37 inches high. She will be a gymnast when she grows up!

Now they are 22 months old, and all talking a lot. It is so cute to hear them voice their opinions, about which shirts to wear, which colors of sippy cups to use, etc, etc.

Both Aya and Koto have much more strong opinions about everything, while Naoto is very easy going and in most cases takes everything offered to him.

(photo: taken about a month ago. Girls are already fighting for a bag to carry.)

We are blessed to have no sickness in the house for the last few months.

Kai just passed one year anniversary post the end of his chemotherapy treatment. He is doing well. He is now doing cub scout to expand his friendship, enjoys biking to school whenever he can, loves learning in general, and is looking forward to learning alto saxophone.

Tomo is ending his Kindergarten. He grew up to be much more confident and out going. He is still very detail oriented, has very good eyes and interpretations to his surroundings, and he is always fun to talk to.

(photo: Kai (left) and TOmo (right), ready to go to a neighbor's house for a play date.)

The summer is approaching, meaning Tomo's kindergarten (which ends at 11:35am), ends too. I was keeping my triplets to have two naps (between 10am til 11:20am, and from 3:30pm until 4:30pm), but girls have been skipping their afternoon or morning naps, either one of them, so I know they are actually pretty ready to have just one longer nap. From next year, Tomo's first grade ends at 2:40pm, so finally triplets can have longer morning activities and longer single nap. I am hoping that will make my daily routine a little easier.

But,,,, before that,,, the summer is going to be here, meaning I will be spending a whole lot more time with five of my kids all together. I hope I will come up with good routine and discipline to manage my days.

Kai turned 10 today, and triplets are now 19 months old.

2009-03-09T23:25:00.000-07:00

Kai turned 10 today, in the midst of all the chaos and hectics.

I was not able to plan anything too wild, big, or special for him, but still he is now big enough to be fine without a huge birthday party. We did buy a nice cake, ate his favorite dinner, clam pasta, and enjoyed finding a rare pokemon cards, gifts from us and from grandparents.

And,,, I am just so happy that he is here, today, smiling, and happy. He is out of treatment for 10 months now, and doing well. Please, no more chemo. I just want him to grow up to be a happy man, who loves his life, and loves what he does (for spare time and for jobs too.)

Triplets are now,,, 19 months old! And I cannot be more tired these days.

Both Aya and Koto are major climbers. They climb up to the middle section of the TV entertainment center. Koto mastered opening up baby latches and gates (why are they being called "childproofing devices" when a year and a half old girl can figure out how to use them all?) Aya just showed me yesterday that she can turn door nobs, and also climbs onto the dining table by holding her body on the edge of the chair and the table. The dining benches have been tucked in close to the table, thinking that if the chairs are positioned that way, babies will not able to climb onto the table. Wrong.

I am starting to feel defeated. Now they REALLY need constant monitoring. My laundry literally piles up, and so do dishes. But hey,,, who cares??? The safety of the kids comes first, so I am just living with this totally disorganized house. And the nice thing is that,,,, kids don't care much about how neat the house is. Our babies and boys are happy still. That is the good news,,, right?

Kai, turned 10 today!

Tomo, now 6 years old.

One of my favorite photos. I got a small table/bench combination for them. For some reasons, they like sitting on one side together. I bolted this table to the wall, using thick chains so they won't move it toward the TV entertainment center to climb onto it.

Naoto

Koto

Aya

Happy Holiday from the Watanabes Elves!

2008-12-12T21:25:00.001-08:00

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Almost 15 months old

2008-10-23T20:59:00.000-07:00

Sorry for not updating this site. We just moved to a new place 3 months ago. While we were settling in, Koto started climbing over Super Yard, all three of them started to walk, and now they started to do baby sign languages too. We were busy childproofing our house. After putting countless latches on cabinet doors, and gated off many areas, finally our house is almost completely safe for our triplets. Still, they do things that we could never imagined, so we really need to keep an eye on them!

Here are photos of our kids.

Here is Naoto.

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Koto

Aya

Kai, trying to get a leaf out of Aya's mouth

All of our kids

From left, Tomo, Naoto, Koto, Kai, and Aya

Kai is doing good. His blood count came back to almost normal. He did get chicken pox, and had to stay home for a few days. I felt totally weird having to keep Kai, not because Kai's immune level is too low from chemo and we need to protect him from getting viruses, but because Kai IS the source of the virus this time, and having to keep him away from other kids to protect them, not Kai.

Tomo is doing great too. After twelve days of crying in the morning, he finally got used to his school. He is learning to read now, and very exited to know that now he can read some simple words.

We are all doing great. I wish I could shed off some fat stored in my tummy, but otherwise we are doing very well!

11 month old!

2008-07-02T09:45:00.001-07:00

I cannot believe they are 11 months old, but they really are growing up!

Aya: She can stand up by herself, and stay standing for a while. So funny to see her drinking a bottle standing up. It looks like a guy drinking a beer. She can do pretend play with a toy telephone, wave hands for "bye bye", and the other day she was climbing up the exercauser! She crawls fast, very curious about everything.

Aya, trying to climb up the exercauser.

Aya, doing sunshine yoga pose.

Koto is also growing up nicely. She is the most independent girl. As soon as we take her out of her crib in the morning, she is the one who takes off to see what her two older brothers are doing in the living room. She loves to clap hands, loves doing pick-a-boo, and dances with my singing. She can also stand for a while.

Koto, giving you a funny face.

Koto (left) and Aya (right) on my friend's tummy.

Naoto is a cutie. He is (for some reasons) more like "a baby" to me than Aya and Koto, my girls. Naoto needs more holding, cuddling, and tickling play. He crawls fast, and eats very well. He is the kind of guy who needs to sleep well, so he naps the lontest. He does not do much tricks compared to girls, but according to our pediatrician, we are seeing the difference in development based on their genders. The girls grow up faster, she said. He actually looks like a girl, so people sometimes wonder if she is the girl, and my girls are actually boys.

Naoto, still dealing with his stranger anxiety. He is getting better.

We are now doing a crazy thing,,,, MOVING! We are moving in less than two weeks, so we are now packing like crazy. After we move, we need to put our house on the market, and to do so we need to upgrade our house; change our windows to double pane window, paint inside and out, renovate our kitchen totally, replace all the light fixtures, and renovate our kitchen floor too. It is too bad that we can not enjoy any of the updates on our current house, because everything is done after we move out. However, I remind myself that we could not do any construction because of Kai, who had been going through heavy chemotherapy for almost 4 years. The fact that he is still here with us is far better than trying to do renovation and exposing him to dangerous construction dust.

Kai is doing great. He is two months into out of treatment. He took his catheter which was implanted in his chest. He keeps asking us to take him to a swimming pool, but we are still a little hesitant to put him into a germ-filled public swimming pool. Our new house has a pool, so we will let him try swimming from our own pool first (with lots of chlorine!)

Tomo is doing great too. He is graduating his daycare soon. He said he would like a brownies for his graduation. He is still quite a media guy, loving PC game and Nintendo DS, but he also still likes learning new things too. I did not know but now Tomo recognize almost all alphabets, and he started to read too. I am glad that we waited one year to start kindergarten. Instead of being the youngest, now he will be one of the oldest, and he is definitely ready now. I hope he will make lots of friends in kindergarten!

Funny news about subway stations in Tokyo

2008-06-20T09:20:00.001-07:00

I just read the news about the train/subways stations in Sibuya, Shinjuku, and Tokyo, and found it to be very funny.

Within about the space of 4 miles by 8 miles, Tokyo has thirteen metro lines. Thirteen, in such a small space.

How do you then put all those subways in it? Basically you dig down deep, and stuck lines together. However, since each one got developed over time, now people are saying that some major stations are like dungeons similar to computer games.

For example, look at the map of Shibuya Station. You really have to be able to know where you are going. Otherwise you get lost.

You can click the image to enlarge it.

Here is another map. It is Tokyo station. The bullet train runs on B7 level, way way down. It can take an hour to walk from one side of the station to another.

Again, click to enlarge the image.

If you really love dungeon game, get an airplane ticket to Tokyo. You can do THE REAL one.

Triplets are 9 months old!

2008-04-28T00:09:00.000-07:00

The last one month has been busy with Kai's fever, low immune level, hospitalization due to fever, and triplets cold and fever, and Yoshi's business trip while Kai was inpatient. I wish I could say other reasons for being busy,,, such as,,, going to a trip, or kid's sport games, or home remodeling. Still, I appreciate everyday that my kids are smiling, and remain happy.

Triplets are growing too. Now all crawl like pros, and hold onto things to stand up.

Here are triplets doing a crawl racing.

Ahhh,,, 8 month old,,, right?

2008-04-11T00:30:00.000-07:00

Photo taken on 3/27/08, taking a nap in their mini-cribs, with Tomo showing cards to babies. From left to right, Naoto, Aya, Koto.

I really do not know why or how it happened, but our triplets are 8 months old! Now it is past 12 midnight, and my brain is now mushed. But I try to capture their growth here before tomorrow (or today?) comes.

Now,,, everyone is crawling! Aya, who started crawling first, is now a steady mover. This morning she decided to wonder out to the hallway to check out daddy and older brothers in another bedroom. Naoto and Koto are also crawling as well, but not as adventurous as Aya. Both Naoto and Aya like to hold onto things and stand up, and Naoto actually can walk a few steps by holding the edge of his crib. Koto, who loves to shout laud, is a happy crawler and still not much interested in standing. Take your time, Koto!

Kai is now having fever, so I took him to the hospital today for antibiotics. He has only 3 more weeks of chemo to go, and he is finally done with his treatment. What a long, tough 3 years and 8 months it has been, but the end is near! I am simply very happy for him. When he was diagnosed with leukemia, he was only 5 and 7 months old, and Tomo, our second son, was not even 2 yet. Now, Tomo is almost at Kai's age when he got sick. Now we have triplets too. So many has changed, but I appreciate we still have Kai with us, Tomo has been a cute, young boy now, and we have triplets who are simply so cute.

I am busy with kids, period. If I can cook, that is a good day. Even if I cannot cook, it is still an OK day. My babies now sleep from 7pm until about 6am, but I do not even go into their room until 7am. They have learnt to entertain themselves in cribs until I walk in with bottles (then everyone start screaming!) Only if I go to bed early, I am not that tired every day, but I tend to stay up until close to 1am.

I also started working part time from home. It is an easy job, which requires me to work as little as 10 hours per week or as much as 30 hours per week. I can do it even with a baby in one arm, as long as I can click my mouse. Still, finding 10 hours per week to work is tough!

Ok,,, I should sleep,,,. Night Night!

Triplets are 7 and a half month!

2008-03-15T08:50:00.000-07:00

Finally,,, all the flu bugs are out of our house, and everyone is healthy!

Kai has only 6 more weeks of chemo to go, and he will be finally out of treatment for his leukemia. I just hope,,, this is THE END of his treatment, and he will not experience any relapse again.

Tomo is enjoying using mama's Nintendo DS, and playing with it whenever he is allowed to do so. Mama (me) uses his as an excuse to play it too, as he often asks me to play for him because he cannot quite read Japanese yet. It is fun to do Dragon Quest for him!

Triplets are doing great. THey are now 7 months and a half.

Aya really started to cruise around the room, so we have to clear everything off from the floor. Naoto loves an exersaucer. When on the floor he rolls around to move. He flips so hard that he hits his head to the floor and cries. Though crying, sometimes he seems to be enjoying too.

Koto is a quiet, yet funny girl. Though not as fast as Aya, and not as strongly as Naoto, she can also do everything from rolling to pre-crawling. She is still smaller than the other two but capable of sleeping throughout the night,,,sort of.

Here is a latest video clip.

As we are so out-numbered by kids, we decided to welcome an Au Pair from Japan. She arrived here two weeks ago. She is such a hard working young lady! She already learnt how to take care of triplets, do laundry and dishes, and started going to a language school in the morning, and volunteer a Japanese language school for kids on Saturday. I hope she can enjoy her time here!

tornado of sickness!

2008-02-13T23:46:00.000-08:00

Well,,,. My plan to update my blog more often sort of failed already,,, but I have an excuse this time. All of my kids had fever over the last 10 days!

It started out with Koto's fever at the end of January, followed by Tomo. He had 24 hours fever.

I thought how lucky I was not to have others with cold, but I was wrong. Naoto got fever last Wednesday, on the day Yoshi left for his business trip. The next day, as Naoto was trying to get better, Aya got fever too,,,. On Friday Yoshi came back. By then Naoto's fever was gone, but Aya was still trying to get better.

I thought,,, how lucky I am because Kai is not sick. But again, I was wrong. Kai looked tired on Friday, so we kept him from his Japanese Saturday school. On Saturday afternoon,,,, he got fever too,,,. When Kai gets fever, he has to go to an ER and get an antibiotics. If his immune level is very low, he also needs to be hospitalized. However, luckily his immune level was not too bad, so after an ER visit, he came back home.

I thought I was lucky to have Kai back because it is much harder when Kai has to be in the hospital. I have to go back and forth between home and the hospital, and it is very tough on everyone. Kai continued to have fever on Sunday too, so he went and ER again to get antibiotics. At night, he seemed better without fever.

I thought this is the end,,, but again,,, I was wrong! Tomo got fever again, and his fever lasted for two days,,,. Meanwhile, Kai's immune level actually did come down on Monday, so he also could not go out side.

Today is the first day after two weeks that no one have fever. Finally, Tomo went back to his day care. Kai's immune level is still too low to go out, but I am really, really hoping that his count will come back up!!!! I need a nap time!!!!!

Because Yoshi needed to be with Kai at home, I took triplets to Synagis shot clinic today. I managed to handle three of them by myself well. I kept them in their car seats when each one of them are getting shots. Now they are able to roll, I cannot leave anyone on an exam table.

Since their Synagis clinic is located in the same area as Kai's Oncology clinic, I was able to take care of Kai's medical appointment change too. The next door is a Day Hospital, where Kai gets his chemotherapy often, and all the nurses came to see my babies too. I told them that I may bring all of them on Friday's chemo if I cannot find any childcare. They said they will be prepared to entertain my babies! I love Children's Hospital!

After their shots, I went down to cafe in the hospital to get some decaf coffee. There were group of people hear the cafe. Apparently they are CostoCo managers, who were there to have a lunch meeting with hospital staffs. (CostoCo donates money to Children's Hospital.) Since they were there, I asked them the question I have been wanting to ask to CostoCo but have not been able to because no one answers the phone there. I wanted to return 12 cans of Similac and exchange them to CostoCo brand formula (cheaper!). They said as long as the expiration date has not passed, I can return the formulas. Good. I save $100 by exchanging them!

Funny,,,. although my day is always so busy, I felt pretty lucky to be able to have some things done just by going to Children's Hospital. Kai's medical appointments are all taken care of, I could ask questions to Oncology nurses about his treatment, and I could even get to talk to CostoCo person!

Hey. My day is not too bad.

Super fast forward,,, now they are 6 months old

2008-02-04T19:36:00.001-08:00

Well. How did it happen? Our babies were born last summer, and now they are already 6 months old,,,,. We named our babies, Aya, Koto, and Naoto. Aya and Koto are identical girls, whereas Naoto is a fraternal boy. They were born on 7/27/07.

I will move all of my diary from my another blog to here, since it is easier to upload photos on this site than the other one.

Our tiny babies were now an average sized babies, doing an month appropriate development. All of them learnt to roll now, especially Naoto and Aya. They also sleep on their tummies.

They are terrible sleepers. On their 6 months old visit, their pediatrician surprized me by telling me that, with their weights (about around 15lb to 16 lb), they are supposed to be able to sleep throughout the night!! I was simply very surpsized to learn about it, because non of my older children slept throughout the night until they were weaned from breastmilk. I thought their waking up every 3 to 4 hours is completely normal, thinking they are hungry, but it was more of a habit than need (or both?)

She suggested me to do "cry it out" method to teach them how to sleep. We immmediately tried it after we came back from the doctor. Tonight is the 4th night. Both Aya and Koto went to bed with very little fussing. Now Naoto is crying for a while. We will see how it goes,,,. I hope they will learn to sleep well, so that they are well rested to enjoy the days!

Here are some pictures.

4 months old. Gosh,,, time flies!

2007-12-06T01:01:00.000-08:00

So sorry for not updating my blog. Time flies so fast! Now triplets are 4 months old. They are doing very well, smiling, making funny sounds, and giggling too. Both Aya and Koto giggle in an exactly the same way, proving to be identicals. Naoto is a strong, cute, funny boy. He hates to be breastfed.

For the last one week has been very tough. Kai, who is still going through chemotherapy, got fever while his immune level was low, so he had to be hospitalized from last Saturday until yesterday. Tomo was sick too and he threw up on Sunday night. He was coughing and having stomachache and diarrhea. Then,,, babies got the same bug. Aya started spitting up, then diarrhea. Koto and Naoto followed the same. So,,,at one point, I had Kai in the hospital, Tomo being sick and waking up at weird hours such as 4am , 5am, and 6am, and all the babies with diarrhea, putting me onto a role of fast diaper changers. I was so exhausted one day that I truly thought I would faint,,.

Now, Kai is back home. Tomo is getting better, and triplets' poops are getting more solid, though still frequent.

Because of this unusually busy days, ANA an excuse :-), I have not been able to bath triplets for about 10 days,,,. However, later tonight I managed to bathe at least Naoto,,,, in a kitchen sink,,, while Aya and Koto were crying because they were so sleepy. They missed the chance to be bathed. Sorry girls! May be tomorrow,,, I will give a try.

I updated some photos on an photo album, so please take a look.

Photo: This is how much bottles I make per day

Aya at 3 months and a half, with Tomo

Koto at 3 months and a half, with Tomo

Naoto at 3 months and a half, with Tomo

I will update more blog a bit by bit.

about,,,10 weeks old, my parents came

2007-10-04T01:00:00.000-07:00

Now it has been about 10 weeks since our triplets were born.

They started to turn their head, follow me with their eyes, and their neck started to be much more steady. They now have more awake time too. They also started to make non-crying sounds, which is very cute! I cannot help but respond to them with 'meow, meow." since it sounds like little kittens!

Here are some highlights since the last time I updated my blog.

***Yoshi went to the first international business trip after triplet's birth***

Yoshi went to Japan for about 6 days. I was so afraid of what would be like when he is gone, but it turned out to be a good week. I received so many help!

My friend took Kai to school every morning, and my neighbor also came over to stay with babies while I took Tomo to his school. They also brought lots of meals and sweets!

On the first night and the next night since he left, my loving night daula came over with her friend between 7pm to 9pm to hold babies, feed them, and cuddle them, so that I could take care of Kai and Tomo.

On the forth night, Kai's school friend's family came over to have dinner together. She took care of Kai and Tomo while I took care of babies.

I lined up afternoon helpers every day, so that I could even take Kai to his hospital for chemo. I took Aya, the best nurser, to drain my milk from my breasts there, and my sitter took care of Koto and Naoto at home. I also hired night daula every night too. Very expensive, but without it I cannot function during the day.

Afterall, during that week, though it was still hard, I did not have to cook at all, everybody checked in to see how I was doing, and it was great to know that I have so many friends that I can rely on.

***Mika had vertigo***

Well,,, Yoshi is now gone again. THis time to Europe. He left on Sunday. Up until then I must say I was sleep deprived, not because of night feeding but more from watching Japanese TV late at night. My body was probably tired, but I did not listen to it well.

On Monday Morning, while I was drawing Kai's blood from his catheter, suddenly, my whole world started to spin. I could not hold still, so I grabbed Kai in order not to faint. I grabbed Tomo's smoothies (he was later complaining about it) to give some sugar in me. I then got nausea after that.

What is this?? I got very scared. If I get sick, our house will not function. As I often say, I am the queen and a slave of our house. I make decisions, and I do what I decide to do.

I thought this is a sign from my body to tell me that I should take care of myself. Luckily, my night daula happened to come back to get her cell phone, so I asked her to stay one more hour. My neighbor, who came to sit babies (so that I could take TOmo to school), jumped in to take care of babies together with daula. While they were here, I called my doctor, made an appointment, called another night daula to see if she could come in the morning, and called another sitter to see if she could stay longer in the afternoon. My neighbor took me to the doctor. I was told it is probably just one time incident, and I am having ear infection. Is this an infection???

After I came back home, my parents arrived from Japan. Poor my dad and mom. As soon as they arrived, they had to jump in and take care of Kai and Tomo (I decided to keep him home.) I took a long long nap.

I decided to rest more that day, and also the next day, but the following day was Kai's treatment day. I sent out an e-mail to bunch of friends, to see if anyone could take Kai to the hospital and stay with him during his chemo. I also asked for another help to take my parents to a grocery store, so that my father, whose passion is cooking, can have fun. Within few hours, I got responses, and all the helpers were lined up perfectly. I slept a lot on the next day too.

Finally, by yesterday (Wednesday), I felt like a normal person. I learnt now that I should not hegitate to get help, and grab rest time as much as possible.

And,,, how are babies doing?? They are doing great!! All are growing well. I must confess that I still have not bathed them as often as I wish, but still they seems fine.

Now my mom is here ( my dad left home today), it is easier. She can cook for us, and also feed babies.

Whenever babies are fussy, she asks me,,

"Are they still hungry?"
"Is her diaper wet?"
"Is it too hot? Should you take of their cloths?"
"No poop yet?"
"Did they burp??"

There is a myth that all the mothers know true reasons of their babies' cry, and she can take care of them right away. But the truth is,,, often I have NO IDEA why they are fussy. Well,, they may be hungry, or sleepy.

But I came to a conclusion that sometimes,,,,maybe,,, they are feeling like to cry,,,. They just want to cry, as if any adult who feels so tired, and want to cry. I wrote Haiku poem about it. I thought I wrote a good one.

Looking at my babies cry
I wonder
There are moments that
they just want to cry
(with no reasons!)

Mmmm,,, translation is hard!!!

I guess,,, 7 weeks old! In-laws went home

2007-09-13T00:58:00.000-07:00

Time is again flying fast, and amazingly our babies are now almost 7 weeks old.

Yesterday we took them to a doctor for a check up. Naoto weighs 9lb and a half, Aya weighs 8lb and a half, and Koto weighs about 7lb and a half. They are growing very well!!!

At home, they are doing all the baby things, eating, burping, peeing, pooping, crying, fussing, smiling and sleeping. It is relatively simple so far, though it can be challenging to take care of them when all three of them get fussy at the same time. Now they are eating anywhere between 2oz (60cc) to 4oz (120cc). The doctor told us that for Naoto we can even increase milk intake up to 5oz (150cc), though he does not seem interested in it.

Our in-laws (finally) left for Japan. They were here for 5 months. It was so wonderful to have them, with help for cooking, shopping, and driving kids to places. However, I think both they, especially mother in law, and we were ready to say bye bye too. Her knee and back seemed so much in pain that she could walk only very slowly toward the end. The father in law was doing well physically, but his way (hard to describe) to deal with Kai and Tomo were a bit too negative. He probably did not realize it much but he often told them not to do this this way , oh this is a bad way, or you should not do this and that. It sounded so negative that I had to tell him not so say things in a negative way.

On the day they left, both Yoshi and I were so relieved for their departure that we both laid down on the carpet and just rested a lot. Now our dishes are often undone, and laundry is accumulating, but we are very relaxed now.

Now, what I need to do is again, managing our lives and surviving. We have been doing OK, but a few nights ago we had a rough night. It was the night without a night daula, so Yoshi was supposed to take care of babies until 2am, and I would take over from 2am until the morning. However, Kai had chemo that day and in the afternoon he started developing fever. When Kai gets fever over 101 F ( 38.3C), he automatically has to go to an ER, and get his blood count taken, culture taken, and gets an antibiotics. We really wanted to avoid the trip to an ER, but by 11pm, his fever was above 101F. Yoshi took Kai to an ER at Childrens Hospital, while I took care of babies all night by myself. Yoshi and Kai came back home at 4am, but of course Yoshi needed to sleep, so I let him sleep with Kai. Luckily babies all did well, and slept in between feedings, so I could get some sleep too, but it was a true reminder of how tough it is to take care of triplets, a kid with cancer, plus one healthy kid with only 2 adults.

The scary thing is that,,, Yoshi will be on his business trip soon. He will be gone for 6 days from this Sunday. We arranged night daula every night during his trip, asked my neighbor to take Kai to school, hired afternoon helpers from Mondays to Thursdays. I still have not figured out how to take Tomo to his day care in the morning though,,,. Should I fetch all three babies in a car to drop Tomo off? Should I ask my neighbor to come to my house in the morning so that I can take Tomo to a school??? Oh,,,I forgot,,,. I still have not found someone to take Kai’s blood to a clinic on Monday for checking his blood count. I ought start making phone calls.

Photo: from left, Naoto, Aya, and Koto

Kai and Tomo, babysitting their brothers and sisters, photo taken on 8/29/07

A month old!

2007-08-27T00:55:00.000-07:00

Today, Aya, Koto, and Naoto are a month old! I cannot believe that one month has already passed. They are growing well, eating well, pooping and peeing well, and sleeping OK. Naoto is probably about 7lb. Koto is about 6lb. Aya is about 6lb and a half.

Both Koto and Naoto have some gas issue, but hopefully it is not so traumatic for them. They can be soothed well if I could hold them to comfort them. It does get tough when two get fussy at the same time. Aya is amazingly simple. She usually eats, becomes happy, looks around, and doses off to sleep, until the next feeding.

Kai and Tomo are adjusting to bigger family well. Both of them play together so well, that they are more like a team. It makes my life a bit easier, since they just take off when together, and playing and doing silly stuffs, and giggling all the time. What happy brothers they are! Every night, they kiss triplets to say good night. Very cute.

I am,,,, doing OK, though feeding every 3 hours is tiring. I have learnt to feed at least two of them on boppies at the same time. I usually nurse one baby with my breastmilk too. Everything is definitely a juggling act. Think about it,,,. You make approximately 48 oz of formula to feed two, plus I am making 24 oz of breastmilk with my body to feed one. It is a lot of fluid! We go through about 30 diapers per day too. I must also confess,,,. I still have not bathed them yet since they came back from NICU. I will do it soon.

One lucky thing is that we have received some support to continue to have night doula for a several more months. THis way, I can rest at night.

Meanwhile, as our in-laws are soon leaving, I am needing to adjust myself to being a queen and slave in the house, making decisions on everything and doing it all too. I have arranged to hire afternoon help from MOnday to Thursday, but still Yoshi will not be back home until 7pm or sometimes until 9pm. Again, survival game will start.

Plus, Yoshi is having another international business trip coming up on the third week of September. I just have NO IDEA how I will survive that week. I will need to use my brain! Anybody want to come over during the feeding time to help me??? If so, you are SUPER welcome!

Photos: Aya and Koto

Naoto, resting by himself

Kai and Tomo. We went to Yank Sing in SF, the best Dim Sum. Babies stayed home with in-laws.

3 weeks old!

2007-08-18T00:55:00.000-07:00

It has been about 3 weeks since our triplets are born. We are doing well, with helps from night doulas. My recovery from c-section is getting better and better. Now, I can even go to a store for a short time to do some shopping.

I have been wanting to update my diary, and kept short notes for each day’s events, but have never had a chance to type them into full sentences. Now, I decided to just start ahead from today’s diary but hopefully update the past diaries slowly.

Yesterday, we took all three of them to a pediatrician to be weighed. They are growing big! Aya, born at 4lb 6oz, now weighs 5lb 5oz. Koto, who weighed only 3lb 14oz, now weighs 5lb! And Naoto, who weighed 4lb 11oz, now weighs 5lb 13oz. Since they are still only 38 weeks and a half gestationally, Naoto is no longer a preemie! At home, they are on anywhere from 2 hours and a half to 4 hours feeding schedule. Now, they are eating anywhere between a little less than 2oz. to 2oz and a half, pretty good for those little babies.

Until two nights ago, we had night time doula help. Though pricy, it has been the best investment that we made. Unlike my past pregnancies with Kai and Tomo, this time, I have a memory of the first few weeks because I am sleeping well at night.

Last night was actually the first night that Yoshi and I tried night time nursing by ourselves. Yoshi took care of triplets with 11pm feeding, while I went to bed with kids at around 9:30pm. Yoshi stayed up until 2am feeding, and I also got up at 2am to do the feeding together. Then Yoshi went to bed, and I took care of them from 2am until the morning.

Aya was very fussy while Yoshi took care of her, and once I took over, both Naoto and Koto were a bit fussy. Luckily, I have a special weapon that only I have, breast milk. Whenever one of them got fussy, I just let them latch onto my breasts, and within 5minutes they were down. I was up pretty much from 2am until 5:30am on and off, but from 5:30am until close to 8am, I could sleep, as all of them slept too. It was not too bad.

I still had enough energy to go out with Kai, Tomo, and Yoshi to go to a science museum while triplets stayed home with in-laws. Kai wanted to show me how he could flip himself forward and backward with bungee elastic code of their circus exhibition. He was amazing, flipping 7 times non-stop! Kai was very happy to finally be able to show it to me real. Thank you, Kai.

Our in-laws leave within 3 weeks. We need to slowly take over housework that they are doing now, so that by the time they go back home, we can function by ourselves. We will see how it goes!

3 days post c-section,,, finally,, Yoshi came.

2007-07-30T00:53:00.000-07:00

This morning, I was still a bit teary. Oh,,, hormone change! However, after sobbing to some supportive nurses and a volunteer visiting from antepertum department, I felt better.

Today, I decided to spend more time pumping my breasts. Most likely Koto will remain in NICU after I get discharged. She will benefit so greatly from my milk. At this point, babies are well taken care of, so I thought I should take care of myself for today.

I asked my lactation consultants to come help me, and she assured me that I am using a pump correctly, and told me to be patient. She was right. Toward the end of the day, I started to have a tiny bit more of colostrums coming out of my nipple. Still,,, very little, but better than nothing!

I tried to have all three of them latch onto my breasts. Both Aya and Naoto were not too interested in it, but my little Koto had her little mouth wide open for me, and she was eager to suck!! Thank you, Koto!!

As of today, Koto’s weight is still close to her birth weight, around 1730gm, but Aya, who weighed 4lb 6oz at birth, lost her weight to 3lb 15 oz, or about 1817gm. She is still having difficulty maintaining her body temperature, so she was under heating light a lot. Naoto is less resistant with his eating, but his bulirubin level is higher now. Still he does not need a photo treatment yet but we are keeping an close eye on him too.

At night, finally, Yoshi came by, and we had both Aya and Naoto in our room to feed.

I am so glad to see Yoshi participating in baby care!! He brought yummy takeout food so finally I ate an outside food after my delivery!!

My pain level is getting better toward the evening, but still I feel pain when I move. It could be from gas, but I do not know,,,,. Again, Yoshi and my in-laws are concerned about my health, and wonder if I could stay a few more days to recover from pain. Remember,,, in Japan, after C-section, moms stay in the hospital for 2 full weeks, so for them it is unbelievable to be discharged only 4 days after surgery. I wrote an e-mail to my OB, so she may be able to help me stay a few more days here.

2 days post c-section,,, still in pain!

2007-07-29T00:53:00.000-07:00

It was another tough day. I was still in pain from c-section. My tummy still looks like 8 months pregnant (singleton, of course.) It could be from gas, but every time I change my position my tummy still hurts.

Still, I tried to visit Koto in NICU. I wanted to do a kangaroo care and possibly recreational feeding. Oh,,, she was so beautiful! Even though she was tiny, she could sack onto my breast, and she was strong! I did a little bit of kangaroo care too, and it was very comforting,,, to me!

However, I got tired very quickly, so I headed back to my room and rested a little. In the afternoon, Kai and Tomo came to see the babies. They could finally see Koto out side an isolette. Both kids were so happy to be able to see her and touch her. Tomo gave her compassionate kiss to her forehead. Unfortunately they could not see Aya and Naoto this time, because Aya needed a heating light treatment to raise her body temperature.

Yoshi was planning to come back to the hospital after he dropped of kids at home, but we ran out of time. I was very disappointed that Yoshi still has not been able to come here alone to look after our babies together.

As the end of the night came, I was exhausted, disappointed with my recovery and lack of breast milk, and felt so overwhelmed with dealing everything by myself in the hospital. It was probably from my big hormone shift change, but I suddenly became very teary and could not stop crying,,,. It was very unusual for me to be like that, but I guess I cannot win against hormone change,,,,. Kind nurses listened to my complaints patiently, and helped me calm down. Thank you so much for their patience.

1 day post delivery, suffering from c-section pain

2007-07-28T00:52:00.000-07:00

Oh pain,,,. I did not know c-section recovery is this tough. Thanks to a change of medication, however, I was finally able to start eating light food such as fruits, bread, and tea today. The pain is still pretty strong for me. In addition to it, finally, my feet started to swell like an elephant! I never had it before, so it is so weird feeling to see my feet so puffed up.

I started to try pumping my milk since this morning. So far, nothing, basically, nothing came out. I am trying to be patient, hoping that sometime soon, my milk supply will kick in.

This morning, I pushed myself to go visit Koto in NICU. A nurse took me there with a wheelchair. It was hard for me to stand up to see her inside an isolette, but I pushed myself to do so. She was tiny, but what a cute girl she is!!! Although my visit was short, I was glad that I made my trip.

Back in my room, the nurse brought Aya and Naoto from a transitional nursery to my room at around 3pm. She ended up just leaving them in my room. Since it was Saturday, Yoshi spent his time with boys at home as promised, thus basically no body was here besides me. It was so nice to be able to be with them, but with this pain, it was very hard for me to look after them alone. By 10pm, I had to ask the nurse to take them back to a nursery.

I just wonder how long this pain persists. Still, after lots of resting and sleeping, I can get out of bed to do just simple things such as peeking babies, walking to a bath room, and pumping. Oh,,, this is tough!

35w 3d the Watanabes Triplet finally arrived.

2007-07-27T00:49:00.000-07:00

FINALLY,,,,, OUR TRIPLET ARRIVED!

In the morning of 7/27/07, our triplet finally emerged into this world!

Baby A, (Aya), 4lb 6oz, an identical girl, born at 10:05am
Baby B, (Koto), 3lb 14oz, an identical girl, born at 10:06am
Baby C, (Naoto), 4lb 11oz, boy, born at 10:08am

Here is me, a day before c-section.

Here are photos of Aya and Naoto in the same picture and Koto in my arm.

Here are boys, playing with a breast pump.

SCHEDULED C-SECTION BECAME AN EMERGENCY C-SECTION

As if my body knew when to give birth, in the morning of my scheduled c-section, I got into labor. I woke up with a contraction in every 5 minutes. Nurses were not so concerned because I would naturally contract with triplet, she said. After fluid for pre-OP went in, my labor slowed down just slightly, to 3 to 7 minutes apart. However, I felt that contraction is stronger than the kind I used to have before, and I also felt a bit more pressure to my pelvis area.

Originally, we were told that our C-section will be delayed from 9:30am to 11:30am due to the first person going in one hour late into a surgery room, and there was another person who needs a c-section as an emergency. However, knowing how fast my labor can be from my past experience (Tomo�s labor was super fast.), at around 8:30am, I asked my Labor and Delivery nurse to see if she could check my cervix. If there is no change, just great, but I felt it is better to be checked.

That was a good decision, because by then, I was already 5 centimeters dilated!! Once the nurse knew that I was in labor, everything went fast, as I became a case of emergency. Everything rolled as fast as it can, and I was wheeled into a surgery room. Spinal anesthesia took a little longer to me, as I did not go numb sooner. After anesthesia finally kicked in, my OB and my perinatologist came into the room, Yoshi came in too, and voala! Everything went fast! Our wonderful doctors performed my C-section like a breeze, and one by one, our babies came out!

It was a funny feeling, as I could feel my body being pulled one way to anther, then Aya came out with a cry. I was so happy that I was a bit teary. Then soon, Koto emerged. She was smaller, so she did not cry right away, but soon she also cried nicely. Then, Naoto, a big guy, came out finally. Aya and Naoto were big enough to go to a transitional nursery, where as Koto, a bit smaller girl, when to NICU.

I did not feel any pain from C-section, so I had a great time with it. However, the recovery was a completely different story. Morphine did not work for me. When I tried to pump my milk, my tummy contracted and got very painful, too painful for me to do anything but rest and sleep. I could not go see my babies until the next day. Today is the third day since delivery, and I am still in pain whenever I move. However, as long as I am in one position, I feel much better.

Kai, Tomo, and in-laws visited the hospital on the day triplet were delivered. Kai and Tomo were cute. When Yoshi told them that they should introduce themselves to the babies, Kai said, �Hi. My name is Kai. I am the third grader in Japanese school.�, and Tomo followed, saying, �Hi. I am Tomo. I am 4 and a half years old.� Yoshi�s dad and mom also seemed so relieved and happy. I am also very happy for them to be able to be here to see their new grandchildren on the day they are born!

Kids visited me again today. Both Kai and Tomo were curious about a breast pump, so they did some trial. They were cute! We all went to see Koto in NICU. The last time they visited NICU, they could see Koto only through an isolette. Today, NICU nurse brought Koto out to my arms to do recreational feeding, so finally Kai and Tomo could see her face! Instead, they could not see both Naoto and Aya, because Aya�s body temperature was a little low. Kai was not that happy, but remember,,, they will have a plenty of time to see and interact with them soon!

4 weeks 6 days, going and going

2007-07-23T00:44:00.000-07:00

(Warning: today’s entry is long!)

Today, I am 34 weeks 6 day pregnant.. Yes. Still,,, pregnant! Tomorrow, I will be 35 weeks. Usually, our doctors do C-section on 35 weeks 0 days, but I picked 35 weeks 3 days as my c-section day just because on that day my favorite doctor can do a surgery. The other day, he stopped by my room, and said to me, " Mmmm,,, you have a very interesting cervix. It shortens early, then almost gets thinner,, but does not happen quite yet, then stays the same." It was almost cute for him to say so. He is usually a nice, serious doctor, so making him say such a joke was funny!

In last one week, I got from big to huge. My tummy looks more like a mini table in front of me. I spend almost all the time laying on bed, and I take naps after every meals I guess babies are still sucking up energy from me.

As the goal of my pregnancy got nearer, my patience finally started to run out. Now, I just cannot eat hospital meals. It is too heavy and too yucky! I have been asking Yoshi and visitors to bring some yummy soup for me instead. I am also counting how many more insulin shots I have to get. I finished tonight’s insulin, so,,, only 9 more shots left until C-section!! I have been dreaming about what I want to eat after my c-section and be free from gestational diabetes. I am thinking of strawberry short cake as the first food to eat.

I also started asking Yoshi to take home some of the stuff that I had here, such as knitting supplies, Tomo’s photo album project supplies, and some baby cloths given to me from friends and nurses. After all, I knit 10 hats and 4 scarves. As the last project (or last way to kill time), I am now crocheting a kid’s hat for my friend’s kid.

On last Sunday, my kids visited me for the last time before babies’ arrival. They were so amazed by the size of my tummy! Kai brought a large transformer toy to show to me, and Tomo was as cute as he always has been. He finally saw his first photo album, and went from pages to pages slowly, commenting about himself. He was very observant! Yoshi, so tired from preparing for the arrival of the babies and dealing with everything else in his life, fell asleep a little again. Thank you for taking care of the house!

So far, though we are still concerned about baby B’s cord blood flow issues, all the babies are doing well. I have biophysical ultrasound and Doppler cord blood flow check up every morning. Their biophysical scores are always good (8 out of 8), and baby B’s Doppler flow runs between 0.70 up to some times 1.0 (absent flow.) Doctors are not too much concerned about this number since the flow issue is not constant, but they are keeping close eyes on her. If her cord blood flow becomes absent to reversed, I will have an emergency c-section.

The other day, I was thinking about c-section. The first thing I thought about was,,, a story called “The wolf and The Seven Young Kids” by brothers Grimm’s tale. In this story, a wolf tricked little seven goats while a mother goat was away, let them open the door, and ate six goats. The smallest one hid inside a clock case, so he survived. When the mother goat came back and heard from the littlest one what happened, she went out to the wood to look for the wolf. The wolf was happily taking a nap under the tree, and as the mother got near, she realized that her little goats were still alive inside the tummy. She asked the youngest one to go get a large scissors, needle, and thread. She cut the tummy of the wolf, and one by one, jumped out were her six little goats! She then sawed up the wolf’s tummy with thread and a needle.

I thought,,, wow,,, this IS exactly like a c-section! When a doctor cut my tummy open, one by one, my triplets will come out!!!!

I had fun thinking about this connection between c-section and grimm’s tale for a while, but still,,, I realized,,, I actually do not know much about it. Then my the other side of brain started to work. I decided to ask L&D nurse to come explain to me the whole procedure of c-section now instead of the night before. She came, and explained to me step by step how they prepare me for c-section from the night before, what kind of anesthesia I will have, how long it may take, and what my recovery is like. She also showed me a video about c-section. It was informational, and finally,,, I felt better and more in control. From the night before, I will not be able to eat or drink anything from midnight (NPO). I asked today's doctor (who always tortures me by telling me all kinds of yummy foods that I cannot eat now due to gestatinional diabetes,) what kind of IV fluid I will be on since the night before the surgery. I asked him if it is regular fluid, or the one with sugar in it. He asked me what kind of fluid I want, so I told him that I want "Toro (a fatty part of tuna, known to be a delicacy with Japanese sushi) fluid. He said fine, he will make one for me! He is also a wonderful doctor.

Now, what do I do for the last 3 days with lots of time? I would like to finish watching Sci Fi channel DVD called “Lost Room”. I also would like to enter some more of medical claim information to my computer. I may want to read a book about preemies a little more too. Then,,, I take naps as much as I can. This is probably the last time I can sleep this much. The next time will probably be more than 10 years later,,,,,,.

34 weeks 1 day, physically getting more tough,,,,,

2007-07-18T00:44:00.000-07:00

It is almost 2am, and I am trying to go to sleep. Yesterday (or should I say today?), I woke up earlier than usual. I took an advantage of early hours and updated Tomo’s photo album. Then breakfast time came, and a visitor came, and,,, suddenly I got really tired,,, still at 9:30am! I tried to rest but my daily ultrasound time came. Everything with our babies were fine, but I really needed to rest for the rest of mid day, from 11am until 3pm. I woke up only for snack, lunch, and bathroom trips, but for most of the time I slept and slept,,,,. I feel like my body is changing every day to meet to the demand of the growth of babies, but it is definitely getting more challenging. I really need to rest more.

I also had a lot more irritation of utero today, and felt more pressure to my bladder. I really feel like things are changing now.

Later today, my friend stopped by for a while with gourmet chicken noodle soup. That was a huge life savor for me, because last night, I finally could not even have a bite of hospital dinner. I almost threw up! Tonight, I had a bowl of soup that she brought for me, and it was sooooo good!

Yoshi had a bit of rough day today too. In order to get home as soon as possible, he decided to drive from San Jose, where he works, toward home, until his teleconference time at 6pm. He could reach as close as Hayward, got off the high way, but by the time he finished his tele-meeting, his car battery went up. His car did not start,,,,. He had to ask around people to see if they have a jump cable to get his car started. As a result, he ended up coming back home later.

After kids are asleep, he and his dad spent several hours clearing our guest room in order to accommodate baby cribs there. Until now, we had all of kids books, toys, and some baby gears stored in that room. It sounded like it was a lot of work. When he called me past midnight, he sounded so tired,,,,,,.

I just hope he does not collapse. He is doing so much for the house, kids, his job, and every little thing about everything.

In 9 days, babies will come. For my part, I continue to concentrate on taking care of myself. That is the best thing for me to do for everyone helping me.

34 weeks! Unbelievable!

2007-07-17T00:43:00.000-07:00

Unbelievably, today, I am 34 weeks pregnant. Who thought I would come this far? Even doctors are surprised. My scheduled C-section day is 10 days away. I do not know if I make it that far or not, but if so, it is almost a joke! I am feeling well, still able to move around, trying to finish the second girl’s hat, and just resting a lot.

Kids came to visit me over the last weekend. They were so sweet. Kai showed me his acrobat act at the circus exhibition with DVD recorder. Tomo wanted me to cut his nails so I groomed him. They tried to feel the babies kick and move, but they were not so cooperative. Then Tomo asked me to open up my mouth, and he was talking to babies through my mouth! So cute!

Unfortunately, Kai is now very immune surpressed. We found out about it yesterday. Now he is stuck at home. I hope Kai’s immune level recovers soon by the end of this week, so that they can visit me again!

33 weeks and 4 days, still pregnant

2007-07-15T00:42:00.000-07:00

Just a quick update that I am still,,,yes, still pregnant. Every morning I go down to an ultrasound, and learn about babies’ condition. So far, they are doing good. On the other hands, I am physically getting very uncomfortable. I need to rest A LOT, and take naps three times a day. Before, I was used to count days as my goal, how I can reach to the next week. Recently, it turned into each day, hoping that I can survive today, and tomorrow. Now,,, I think of hours, how I can spend my time for the next one hour. I really do not know if my body can last for the next two weeks with this pregnancy, but we will see,,,.

33 weeks 0 day, a little concern,,,

2007-07-10T00:41:00.000-07:00

Quick update and concerns:

During last week’s growth ultrasound, we noticed that baby A’s amniotic fluid was on low side, though her size was good. Meanwhile, we noticed that baby B (baby A’s identical sister) weighs a lot less than baby A. Baby A weighs about 4lb 7oz while baby B weighs about 3lb 4oz. The doctor ordered biophysical profile ultrasound (monitoring movement, heart rate, amniotic fluid level, and breathing practice.) twice a week from now on, with daily non-stress test twice a day. I asked Doppler test to be added to biophysical profile.

Today, we did an ultrasound, but baby A’s fluid level was still quite low. The tech could measure only two pockets of fluid, and it was on low side. Baby B’s blood flow showed some minor resistance, but it was not a big concern to the doctor.

The doctor was more worried about baby A’s low fluid level. He asked me to drink more water, get non-stress test also during the over night sift, plus he ordered another amniotic fluid level test tomorrow.

I am drinking water a lot now. I feel totally fine. All the babies look fine also with non-stress test. Their biophysical profile’s scores have been perfect too.

The tech today, after measuring two pocket of fluid on baby A, had to leave early, so another person took over her position. However, because he could not know exactly which pockets of fluid the former person measured, he did not measure the other two times. Tomorrow, I will demand that one person will do the test from the beginning to the end, so that the information gathered will be complete.

I do not want to give birth yet. I feel totally fine. If it is not healthy for the babies to be inside me, I can happily deliver them any time. However, if the decision has to be made by a tech’s result who run out of time to measure completely, I will have to demand another test.

I hope I do not have to go to an emergency C-section tomorrow,,,

32 weeks 0 day - a big goal reached!

2007-07-03T00:41:00.000-07:00

This day has come, as if any other day. Today, I am 32 weeks 0 day pregnant! I never really thought I can reach this far. I am so thankful for everyone and everything supporting me and our triplets. Thank you so much ( to whoever and whatever it is!)

And,,, today’s doctor was my most favorite one, Dr.M, who I trust very much. I asked him when my scheduled C-section may be if the miracle and weird magic happens and I never go into labor. He gave me several choices of days, each with different doctors. I chose the day that Dr.M is here. So,,, now, my scheduled C-section date is July 27th, Friday, at 9:30am! That will be 35 weeks 3 days. Will I be able to make that far? I do not know. However, it was so exciting for me to now have a definite day for our triplets’ births!

Yoshi left for Japan today, and will come back from there on Saturday morning, 4 days later. Now, my immediate goal is to remain pregnant until he comes back. I already ordered baby inner wears and some baby gears (plus some of my favorite comic books) sent to his hotel in Japan. He has to bring them back!

From now on, what I wish is the same; having a boring, very uneventful day every day. We will see how it goes.

Again, no high blood pressure, no leg swelling, no stressed liver function, and no sign of any active labor. Great!

31 weeks today!!!

2007-06-26T00:40:00.000-07:00

I cannot believe it, but today I am 31 weeks. I am so happy to have reached this far. Still, I am feeling well, no back pain (thanks to bed rest all day), no major discomfort, no swelling of feet, and no high blood pressure. My tummy is definitely getting bigger and bigger, and it is getting a bit harder for me to change positions on bed, or to get up, but still I can move around OK.

Yoshi finally bought a new car! We went for Toyota Sienna 8 passenger minivan. Both Kai and Tomo are very excited about it. They visited me last Sunday, and showed me a car by parking it right out side my window! It seems like a great car.

When kids came, Kai was amazed by my tummy size. It really did get bigger in one week. Kai showed me again some of the school work he did in Japanese school, and Tomo again gave me a big big hug and kisses.

Tomo was asking me when I will come back home. I told him, I do not know yet because it is up to babies. I told him both I and doctors are asking to babies when they will come out, but they keep telling us (in a baby voice) “Mmmmm,,,I still don’t know!” so we are waiting for them to decide. He liked my explanation with baby voices and he was giggling.

I told Kai that the longest stay will be after kids visit me (on Sundays) 4 or 5 more times. Kai was happy to know that it is “just” only 4 or 5 more weeks. I am glad to know that he found it to be “short” instead of “long”.

I will try to continue what I am doing, bed rest, eat, and rest, and rest. I do have more occasional contractions now than before, but I hope it does not change my cervix. 32 weeks is just one more week away!

30w3d pressure from father in law,,,again

2007-06-22T00:39:00.000-07:00

Well,,, Yoshi’s dad has done it again, giving me tons of stress. Now, whenever I have a chance to call home, he keeps telling me that I MUST NOT give birth while Yoshi will be out of town. (Yoshi has to go to Japan when I am 32 weeks 0 day ~ 5 days). Before he started saying this to me, he was always telling me that I must remain pregnant AT LEAST until 32 weeks. What he says are so unrealistic!

At first, I just ignored him and did not reply or say anything. Soon, I started to say that he should tell those things to my babies, not me, because I do not have any control. Now, I am ready to tell him that the pressure he gives me will induce contractions and I will give birth from it!!!

Yesterday, I almost said it to him, but then Yoshi called me on another line so I hung up the phone with in-laws. I then told Yoshi what I have been told all the time, and asked him to talk to them. Yoshi too seemed a little stressed to have to deal with their high and unrealistic expectation too,,,.

Otherwise,,, I am all doing well. Today, I am 30 weeks 3 days pregnant! Yesterday I had an ultrasound with cervix check up and biophysical data of the babeis. All the babies are moving well, within normal heart rate, with good amniotic fluid level, and are practicing breathing. My cervix got longer again; now 2.2cm! I hope my doctor will not kick me out of the hospital,,,. I do not want to go home, and live under high expectation of in-laws toward my pregnancy,,,,.

I am physically doing well too, still no back pain, no swelling of feet, no high blood pressure, and no regular contractions. I do feel occasional contractions, but I hope it remains painless and not regular!

I finished making the third preemie hats yesterday. Now, I have something for my triplets! I am glad that I could make something for them. With Kai, I knitted a beautiful, lacy baby blanket with very fine baby yarn before I gave birth to him. With Tomo, I started knitting a cardigan before he was born, and finished it when he was 9 months old, just before he outgrew my cardigan size. With triplets, at least they have hats. Hats are great, so small and easy to knit. I think I will keep knitting hats of various sizes, so that they can wear them in different ages. But before doing so, I am supposed to knit Tomo’s hat.

Yoshi is getting ready to buy a new mini-van. He has been researching about it a lot, and talking about it all the time. He is ready to buy it this weekend! I hope his negotiation with a dealer will be successful!

29 weeks 2 days, growth ultrasound

2007-06-14T09:08:00.000-07:00

Today, I am 29 weeks and 2 days. I had an ultrasound done, including growth ultrasound. All the babies are growing well! Baby A’s approx. weight is 2 lb 13 oz, (about 1250g), baby B is 2 lb 5 oz (about 1050g), and baby C is about 2 lb 12 oz (about 1220g). This means most of them grew about one lb in last 3 weeks. I am very happy about the gain they put onto themselves. This torturous 2200 calorie diet in the hospital is paying off! In 4 weeks, I gained about 7 lb too.

I hope to keep up with eating and resting, to give all the good calories to the babies. In 5 days, I will be 30 weeks. I hope I will make it!

Meanwhile, all the sudden, I started to feel very big and full. Up until recently I had almost no to very little physical discomfort. Now, if I sit up too long, my back gets sore easily. When laying down, I feel better if prop up myself in angle, so that I do not lay flat on a bed. My belly is big (to me, but not too much to others), and I do not know how much bigger I will get! I am definitely feeling as if I am now entering to this unknown territory. I keep telling myself that, if human can become severely obese, my skin should also be able to stretch to unimaginable size.

At home, things seem to be going smooth. Last night, Yoshi and I gave our in-laws tickets to see Don Giovanni, an opera in a city. They had a good time! I am glad that they finally had a chance to go out. I hope it was refreshing for them, after helping our chaotic family with lots of medical challenges for two months non stop.

Yesterday, I also had a chance to talk to them about what can cause emergency C-section. I explained to them, beside regular preterm labor with contractions, there are many other reasons that babies need to born sooner. One or more babies’ heart rates can go down too low, some babies’ amniotic fluid gets too little, baby’s blood flow in umbilical cord can get reversed, mother’s liver function can fail, or mother’s heart can get too stressed out. They were not aware of those possibilities, and it was good for me to be able to explain it to them. There are so many factors which are out of my or even doctors’ control, and I wanted them to know that (so that they will not blame on me if I deliver early!)

My lovely Yoshi, who is also very work-driven, told me that he has another oversea business trip coming up, when I am 32 weeks 0 day until 32 weeks 5 day. At first, I could not believe what he was saying, but eventually started to think that what is most important is the safe arrival of our babies. If Yoshi can be with me during c-section, great. However, even if he is here, he may still not be able to attend to a surgery since it will most likely be an emergency c-section if I need to deliver the babies around that time. Still, I hope our babies will not get born while Yoshi is away.

28 weeks 6 days, still in the hospital!

2007-06-11T12:37:00.000-07:00

Today, I am 28 weeks 6 days. In just one more day I will be 29 weeks. Yappy~! I am so thankful to still be pregnant.

And,, the good thing is that, I am still in the hospital. After my nervous breakdown the other day, it was clear to me that I should not go home. It will be mentally too challenging. The doctor who suggested me to go home agreed to let me stay here, and today, even the easiest going doctor said that he understands my home situation, and told me that I am allowed to stay here. Now, I am very relieved. He even told me that he has a crystal ball, telling me that I will go until 36 weeks! I will believe in that!

I have been doing well, still doing the same thing that I would have been doing if I were at home; insurance disputes, medical payment discrepancy adjustments, and follow up of insurance payments to medical service providers. On Sunday, kids and Yoshi came over and brought all the mails that we got over the week. We had lots of letters, but all of them were either from our insurance company, or from medical service providers asking me to pay! It was so depressing,,, such an honest and true reflection of our life! Our insurance company has been denying some claims. Medical service providers are charging me wrong. I am the only one following up with everything. I wished I had an office here in the hospital,,,,. Maybe,,, I should even bring a printer so that I can print out documents, and mail them out too,,,,.

Sunday’s kids’ visit was fun. They brought a brochure of a mini van that we are thinking of buying. Kai and Tomo already decided where to sit, which color of the car, seat color, and options they want. Three of us were looking at the catalogue together on our bed, all closely laying side by side. It was so nice and fun to cuddle up with them! I could see how much Kai misses me, probably more than Tomo does. I hope he can survive a bit more without me at home, until triplets are born. They brought some drawings for me to put on the wall. I love looking at them!

Kai’s appetite is now very low. He has a mouth sore and is having difficulty eating. Plus, because of his oral chemo, his appetite is low too. Still, he managed to eat some milk, one banana, some strawberries, and miso soup. I really hope his appetite comes back.

28 weeks 3 days, having nervous breakdown.

2007-06-09T12:34:00.000-07:00

Today I and 28 weeks 3 days pregnant. Still, so far, so good. So much so that now some doctors are starting to suggest me to go home. They said that my cervix remains stable at 1.9cm, without any contractions. Since I pass 28 weeks, they think that I am going to be fine at home.

This offer to go home actually gave me a total meltdown because,,,, I do not want to go home.

My home life is more stressful than my hospital life. It is nice to be able to be with kids, but they are not so gentle to my body. They tend to want to lay down with me close all the time, giving me no rest. At night, Tomo and Kai come close to me, sometimes even kicking my tummy unintentionally. They are lovely, but still need lots of help and attention from me.

And,,,, what I wish to avoid but cannot at home is an attention from my in-laws. I cannot bear to live with their constant attention to me, and how much anxiety they will have from my every movement. They get nervous, when I stand up to go to a bathroom, extend my arms to grab something, or go to a kitchen to grab my snacks.

Their expectation is too high and unrealistic. They have been telling Yoshi that I should reach AT LEAST to 32 weeks. Who knows when I will deliver??? I can clearly see, if I deliver sooner, that I will be blamed by them for not resting enough. I cannot live with it. I really do not need that kind of stress in me especially now. They even told me that the reason of my hospitalization was because I moved so much for a week to buy used baby items. Here I am already blamed for my action. I told them that it is nature of my body to have shortened cervix. I had it with Kai and Tomo. However, they just cannot accept it, and it is all because of my moving too much. I do not want to take such a comment any more.

The thought of possibly having to go back home even brought me a nervous breakdown. I even cried by this thoughts. Yoshi feels that I should stay here, and I want to do so too. He feels that this is the time for me to be selfish, and insist on staying in the hospital, to give the best chance to our triplet. After my nervous breakdown, I have realized how much stressed I will feel if I go home. I think I will tell my doctor tomorrow that I just do not want to go home.

MEDICAL NOTE:

Yesterday I had my ultrasound done. My cervix was 1.9cm. All the babies seem to be doing well, though the technician who did the first half of my ultrasound was a bit concerned about baby A’s amniotic fluid level. She felt it is too low. However, the second technician was not concerned, so I hope they are right about it. My next ultrasound is next Thursday. I will do a growth ultrasound as well, so that I will know an estimated weight of our babies!

28 weeks 0 day! I made it to my second milestone!

2007-06-05T12:28:00.000-07:00

Guess what? Today,,,, I am 28 WEEKS PREGNANT!!!! Yeah!!! I reached my second goal!! When I got admitted to the hospital, I was only 25 weeks and a half, and really was not sure if I could make this far. I feel so fortunate to be able to still be pregnant. Now, my next goal is 30 weeks. I hope I make it to this next goal.

I am feeling good. Again, no contractions, no pain, and no discomfort. I still need to watch my blood sugar level. Now I am on insulin. I need to give myself shots three times a day, but it is actually not too bad,,, well,,,compared to all the infertility shots I had to give to myself.

Today’s doctor, Dr.L, who is the most easy going doctor, said that I can go home. Of course, I refused, asking him if I can still be here. He feels that it does not matter whether I am home or in the hospital since my cervix has not been changed for a few weeks. Babies will come when they are ready. However, I told him it is more about my mental health, and also the mental health of my in-laws. I explained to him that by me staying here, everyone’s anxiety can remain low, and as a result, it is good for the babies too. He said it is fine for me to be here too, so here I am, still in the hospital, probably for the duration of pregnancy.

I am still doing fine here alone. I just started working on Tomo’s photo album. It has been stopped since pictures of Tomo at 4 months old. He is now 4 and a half year old! He deserves to have a nice baby photo album. Yesterday, I worked on it, and it was so much fun! Kai in the picture was only 4 years old too, the current age of Tomo, so it was fun to compare the two. Tomo looks very different, still very chubby and cute. He looks like a Buddha in his baby photos. This fun album project, along with baby hat knitting project are filling up my long days.

Kai’s chemotherapy has been held off for a while due to low immune level, but today, finally he could restart chemo. I am so happy and relieved. It is so scary to be off chemo for too long. I just hope that his blood count remains stable, so he can continue to get his chemo to control his leukemia.

I am a bit worried again about Kai and in-laws, especially my father-in-law. He feels so much responsible and concerned about Kai’s homework. So much so that he is really pushing Kai to do his homework. He also talks about it, remind Kai about it, and keep asking about it to Kai as soon as he wakes up. It seems just too much. He also wants to run everything without any wasted time as possible, so he is always rushing Kai, to get out of the house to go to a clinic and to get out of the clinic to go to school. I told him that he does not rush kids so much, but partly it is his nature and personality which is doing so, so I do not know if he can change himself.

What I worry about is Kai. He does not like conflict, so when someone is pressuring him unreasonably, or if his friends are being mean to him, he just takes them in, and do not argue back too much. I know he will not argue back to my father-in-law even if Kai feels too pressured by him, and as a result, his frustration builds up, and eventually becomes hating him. Yoshi is out of town, and will be back tomorrow. I hope he can observe the situation at home between Kai and father-in-law, and hopefully he can give some good suggestions or intervention between them.

27 weeks 4 days, oh,,, getting bored

2007-06-02T12:18:00.000-07:00

I am still here in the hospital. It has been,,,,16 days so far??? I guess so. I am doing good, still no contractions, no change in cervix length, and simply,,,,,I am incubating now.

Two days ago on Thursday, I had an ultrasound exam. My cervix remained at where it has been for the last two to three weeks. The measurement was 1.8cm which is,,, good! No change is good news. We also did biophysical exam on babies. All the babies were practicing breathing, moving a lot, with strong heart beats and good amount of amniotic fluid. Wonderful,,,.

To be honest,,,,I have been getting slightly bored. This hospital room is now my world. I watch Japanese TV series on DVD and play solitaire a lot on my computer. However, after watching so many Japanese dramas, I am running out of my stock. My friends lend me some DVD too, so I will move onto it. I knit one preemie hat, but it was,,, a bit boring. I still need to make two more though for triplets. I am also thinking of knitting Tomo and Kai’s scarves or hats. Also, it should be a good time to complete Tomo’s photo album, which has been stopped with pictures of Tomo when he was still a few months old. I know I have a lot to do, but sometimes I just do not feel like to things,,,,,. Oh well, it just is boring, but still this is the best place for triplets. I will enjoy this boredom because,,,,, I will not be able to have time like this for many years after triplets are born.

I am getting sick and tired of hospital foods. Oh,,,, I miss more gourmet foods,,,, something just a bit,,,,no,,,a lot more elaborate than hospital foods, such as yummy Indian curry from Vik’s, Japanese Kaiseki food from Japan, Thai foods with lots of spices, egg plants, and delicious sauce, Korean Tofu chige soup with mussels, clams, shrimps, etc at Tofu House in SF,,,and,,,fresh pate sandwich with homemade pickles at Café Clan in Berkeley, and simple yet yummy and fresh Italian pasta with Tomato sauce from a Trattoria hear Piazza Navona. Oh,,, how about zucchini flowers filled with mozzarella cheese and fried crisp. Oden from a restaurant in Ginza, Tokyo would bring me a smile too. Well,,,,dreaming is good, right? I know this food torture at the hospital is just a short deal in my long life. Once babies are born and my gestational diabetes is gone, I will head up to my favorite gourmet restaurants!!!!

Good news is that,,, this torturous food and feeding is starting to pay off. Since I got hospitalized, I gained 4 lb (in just two weeks!) When I was at home, I had hard time gaining weight. I thought I was eating properly and enough, but I guess I needed to eat more. I was cutting back my carbohydrate intake to only small amounts for each meal (6 times a day) but I needed a whole lot more. Of course, my blood sugar went up very high now, but a dietician said it is better to get calories and control blood sugar level with medication than not eating enough. So far, I have gained about 19 lb since pre-pregnancy. Compared to others, still it is a small gain, but for me it is a big accomplishment!

My kids will be visiting here later today. I cannot wait to see them!!!

26 weeks 6 days, family visit

2007-05-28T12:16:00.000-07:00

Today, Kai, Tomo, and Yoshi came over to the hospital with dinner. It was so good to see them! Both Kai and Tomo were very cuddly and doing great! Kai was joking a lot again, and Tomo was copying Kai a lot. Yoshi showed me a mini video of Kai on bike and Tomo on tricycle. I am so glad to see Kai active again, and oh,,,Tomo,,, he was so cute on a small tricycle. He still refuses to try a bicycle and totally happy with a tricycle. They brought Miso soup, rice balls, fried chicken, and vegetable to eat. Oh,,, Miso soup tasted wonderful!!!

Yoshi was tired,,, as usual,, from jet lag, playing with kids without enough rest, and amount of work he still has to do with his job. Poor Yoshi. I wonder when he can get decent rest,,,,.

When they were leaving, Kai was having a little hard time, saying that he wants to stay with me. I know,,,. I want to stay with you too,,,. It is just a short time in our family life, so please bear with us.

Since yesterday, I am having non-stress test twice a day. Baby A and C’s heart beats can be found pretty easily, but Baby B is always moving around, and doing lots of hide and seek. Still they all seem to be doing well.

Tomorrow will probably be another quiet day. I asked Yoshi to bring some paperwork to do, so hopefully I can complete some of the medical related paperwork done tomorrow.

26 weeks 5 days, quiet day

2007-05-27T12:12:00.000-07:00

It is Sunday, and Memorial weekend. What a quiet day for me.

I heard that my family went to Dim Sum place called Yank Sing in San Francisco today. It is Kai’s favorite place, and he loves their shrimp dumplings. Later I heard kids went to a park to ride bikes. I am so glad to hear that finally, Kai has energy to do things like that! He was also able to start a new phase of chemotherapy treatment called Maintenance since yesterday. His immune level came back just high enough to start a treatment. We have to still pay close attention to his blood count, but at least he could move onto his chemo, so I am happy about it.

I had a very quiet, easy day today. I woke up at 9am, and got late breakfast. I watched my favorite TV program DVD in the morning, read a book about Preemies, took a long afternoon nap, read Japanese book about a magician (Onmyo-ji) in Muromachi era, and then again watched some Japanese drama episodes.

Meanwhile, I was fed like a pig again today, 6 meals per day. I was weighed today, and learnt that now I weigh 137.7lb, about 1.8 lb gains from last week! I am happy to know finally I could gain some weight! Still, I gained only 16.7lb from pre-pregnancy, but I hope I continue to gain my weight as I stay on this painful, torturous high calorie diet.

My favorite doctor M came to check on me today. My blood sugar level after meals went up a little bit, so he put me onto a medication called Glyburide. I started out with only 0.6 mg for two days, but from tomorrow, it will go up to 1.2mg. I am also on iron pill, pre-natal vitamin, and stool softener. My bowel movement is S.L.O.W.! Doctor M also said, since I am close to 27 weeks, I should have non-stress test monitoring twice a day from now on.

I really like Dr. M’s approach. He is careful and through but not overly cautious. For example, since I do not have any regular contractions, I am not on any IV meds or fluid, so I am still quite mobile. He is also the one who put me onto a weekly hydroprogesterone shots, weekly cervix ultrasound, and he diagnosed gestational diabetes. I feel very comfortable working with him.

Tomorrow, Yoshi, Tomo, and Kai are going to visit me here. I cannot wait to see them again! This time, I want to cuddle Kai more. He was shy last time for some reasons, so I want to be closer to him. I am sure that Tomo will come right to me, so I am looking forward to cuddling him too!!! I have not seen Yoshi for about a week since he was on his business trip. It is good to see him. I just spoke with him on the phone. We thought we really should start thinking about our babies’ names!!! Boy’s name is easier, but girls’ names are very hard!!!

26 weeks 4 days, visits from my family

2007-05-26T11:26:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Kai, Tomo, and my in-laws visited me at the hospital. It was soooo nice to see them!!! Tomo was cute. As soon as he walked into a room, he washed his hands, took off his shoes, and jumped onto my bed to get cuddled. Kai was a bit shy at first, but eventually showed me some math project that he did with his grandpa, and also got close to me to be hugged. They are doing well, and I am so glad to see them not too anxious about me.

In contrary, I could see that my in-laws are still very worried about me. I do have permission to sit up, go to a bath room, and take a shower every day, so when they came, I just sat up at the edge of the bed. Immediately, my father-in-law said I should lay down. I told him that it is OK for me to sit up for a short time, and his face was so anxious,,,,. I also asked my mother-in-law to bring a short pant for me because my room gets very hot in the afternoon. However, she said that I should not expose my lower legs, as it can induce preterm labor. It is an old saying in Japan. I told her that I asked a doctor about it, and doctor said I can wear whatever I want, but she would still continue to advise me to only wear a long pants (in a room where I am sweating,,,.)

After they went back home, I am even more convinced that I should stay here in the hospital, if I can, for the duration of my pregnancy. It is hard for kids, but I just cannot handle my in-laws’ overly anxious attention to me. I know they are worried about me naturally because they really want me to have a successful pregnancy. If I were home, my action will be watched by them, and every time I stand up, they will be freaking out. I felt their high level of anxiety will bring me more stress to me, and as a result it is not good for me or them.

Later at night, I called them at home and thanked them to bring kids to the hospital. My father-in-law kept saying to me that I should hold onto this pregnancy until 32 weeks. I kept saying that my next goal is 28 weeks, and I will think of future once I cross my second goal. Still, he kept saying repeatedly that I should try to reach until 32 weeks. I finally had to say to him that he is putting too much pressure on me by saying so, and asked him to think that I have to take one step at a time.

Think of it. If I am home, I will have to listen to such comments ALL THE TIME. I just cannot handle that right now.

Thankfully, I am doing great. No major changes, no contraction, thus no IV fluids or meds, and simply I am camping out here alone. I will stay here for a while.

26 weeks 2 days, growth and cervix ultrasound

2007-05-24T11:25:00.000-07:00

Today is day 8 of my hospitalization. It had been going pretty well and relatively easy for me,, until last night. I had a major heart burn and acid reflux. I had to ask for the medication in the middle of the night. This morning, I was so scared to even try to eat! It is so hard to gain weight for me,,,. I do not know why I do not gain weight. Is it because my metabolism is too good? I finally started asking friends to bring in some small meals for me, to give me a variety. Hospital food is actually terrible, but I still try to eat for the babies.

This morning, I had growth ultrasound. All the babies are doing great, with strong heart beat. Their size is smaller than their gestational week, but they are around 26~32 percentiles. Baby A (an identical girl) weighs 1 lb 12 oz, Baby B (the other identical girl) weighs 1 lb and 8 oz, and the Baby C (a boy in a single room) weighs 1 lb10oz, so they are all around the same weights.

While babies are good, my cervix remains the same. It was about 1.6~1.8cm long (or short?), and the funneling that I had now turned into deletion,,,. It is now 4mm deleted. I must say this is somewhat expected, as I had the same issue with Tomo. I just hope, just like Tomo’s case, the cervix still holds babies even after it starts to delete. With Tomo, by 37 weeks I was 4 cm deleted, but Tomo was born on 41 weeks! I hope the same thing happen to triplet.

Oh,,, I am sleepy. I played Solitaire last night, and could not stop playing until quite late. Fire alarm went off so many times too, that my sleep was very chopped up! OK, dosing to an afternoon nap,,,. Mmmmmm.

26 weeks 0 day, day 6 of hospitalization

2007-05-22T11:20:00.000-07:00

Today is day 6 of my hospital stay. So far, no change, including cervix measurement. Yesterday, I had another ultrasound to check my cervix length. It was still around 1.6cm, so there is no improvement, though there is no progression either. Good. I also had biophysical ultrasound too. All the babies are doing great, with heart rate ranging between 140~ 150/minutes. They are also practicing breathing too!!! It is amazing to see what those little bodies are trying to do.

Yesterday’s doctor was Dr.L, the easiest going one. As I guessed, he gave me an option to go home. His rational was that, my babies do not know where I am, at home or in the hospital. I am carrying triplets, so of course my cervix will get short. If the labor starts, it starts anyway, so if I want to go home, I can, especially if I am worried about Kai.

I felt torn for a moment. In a way, it is good if I can go home. I can be with Kai and Tomo, so they will not feel too lonely. Yoshi is currently in Europe, so my in-laws are taking care of kids. I would be nice if I can be home.

However,,,, will I be able to rest at home, as much as I am resting here? No. At home, I tend to get up more. Will kids be gentle to me? I guess,,, no. We all sleep in the same bed. In the middle of the night, they will come close to me. Whenever they move next to me, I had contractions. Tomo also jumps over me while I lay on bed. Will it be easier for my in-laws to have me at home? I do not think so either. In addition to taking care of kids, they will have to take care of me, because,,, I am on bed rest and so useless, at least physically. Will my return lower anxiety of my in-laws? No. They will be more worried by having me home. The most important of all, will it be good for babies? I do not think so either. I have less contraction and stress by being in the hospital. It is better also for babies if I stay here.

It seems that there are more benefit for me to stay here than going back home, so I decided to remain here in the hospital. I am hoping to reach to 28 weeks. Just two more weeks to go!

I am doing OK, though I am definitely starting to have some physical discomfort. Whenever I move my position, I get pain around my tummy because babies sift and my body parts get pulled. I am starting to have some back pain too,,,,. I am interestingly very sleepy, and I can sleep many hours any time, as if my body is craving for it.

The toughest part of my stay is diet. Dietitians are very concerned about my weight gain. I gained only 15 lb so far, and they want me to gain more! I am now on 2400 calorie diet, and it is A LOT to me,,,,. I started to have stomachache due to eating too much. Yesterday I spoke with one of the dietitians and asked her to modify my menu, so that the quantity that I have to eat is less but the amount of calories remain the same. I hope it works!

Here in the hospital, I heard that there are physical therapists, massage therapists, occupational therapists, and bed rest support group. I will try to take advantage of them to ease my physical discomfort.

I do miss my kids at home,,,,, but interestingly,,, not as much as I thought. I want to see them, and have them visit me, but at the same time I want them to have some kind of normalcy or regularity in their lives. It is OK if I do not see them for several days if their daily routine can be maintained as simple and usual, under this unusual circumstance.

25 weeks and 4 days, hospitalization

2007-05-19T11:16:00.000-07:00

On Thursday, 17th of May, I went to my routine weekly cervical check ultrasound. We found out that my cervix, which was closed and 2.5cm long last time, started to funnel a little bit, and got shorten to only 1.4cm long. They immediately admitted me for 24 hours monitoring, but yesterday’s ultrasound did not show any change. Now, it is most likely that I will remain here in the hospital at least until I am 28 weeks pregnant. (I am now 25 weeks and 4 days).

In a way, this is something expected to happen considering what I went through with my past two pregnancies. With Kai and Tomo, though they were born full term, my cervix started to shorten at around 28 weeks~30 weeks, and I was put on strict bed rest on both pregnancies. That is why I requested a weekly ultrasound check up instead of bi-weekly checkup which usually our doctors recommend.

For the last two days, I stayed in Labor and Deliver room. However, the bed is so uncomfortable (too hard!), so I asked to see if I am stable enough to be moved to anti-partum unit. Today’s doctor felt fine, so I am soon moving to a better room, with more comfortable bed.

My privilege is still moderate. I am allowed to go to a bathroom, shower daily, and eat my meals sitting up, but for all other times I am advised to be on bed. As long as I drink a lot, I do not have to be on IV fluid. I am now on a pill to ease my mild, infrequent contractions. If it gets more constant and if I have more than 6 contractions per hour, I will have to be on a very strong IV medication with magnesium to control my contractions. I have heard so many awful thing about its side effect, so I am trying to avoid it as much as possible by hydrating myself and making sure that my bladder is not full.

The hospital stay is not so bad so far, but I will see how I will feel after several weeks. Whenever I feel like I am starting to have negative thoughts, I try to remember,,, Kai stayed in the hospital for 28 days when he was diagnosed with leukemia when he as 5 and a half. Unexpectedly, he had to have a surgery to put his catheter in, have several surgical procedure with anesthesia, and had to go through very heavy chemo. He survived them all, with his natural humor and positive attitude. In a way, my hospitalization is somewhat predicted, and so far the only thing I have to do which is not so pleasant is having to be in bed, and having to eat a lot of food. It should be much easer than what Kai have been through for the last two and a half years. I should be able to handle this staty!

As I mentioned though, one of the toughest thing for me now is the amount of food that I have to eat. The dietician here said, for triplets, I need to eat a lot more than I used to eat. She put me onto 2400 calorie diet, and it is a lot!!! I am full all the time, but try eating everything they bring, so that I can gain weight. In two days, I already gained 3 pounds! I will try my best eating more.

I have not met Kai and Tomo yet, but they will visit me later today. I really hope they will survive without me. Unfortunately, Yoshi has to go to his business trip from tomorrow for a week,,,,. My in-laws have to take care of kids. I hope my kids remain safe, and my in-laws can survive the stress of dealing with my kids,,,,.

Please pray that my triplets stay inside me a bit longer. I am teling them it is still so much easier and more comfortable to be inside me!

25 weeks and 0 day pregnant, doing well

2007-05-15T09:07:00.000-07:00

Woo hee. Today, I am 25 weeks pregnant. I survived one week all right.

Kai, (our oldest 8 year-old son, relapsed leukemia patient,) who was hospitalized due to low immune level followed by fever, stayed in the hospital for 9 days. Kai’s fever went away quickly, but his immune level went down very low, with hemoglobin and platelet dropping too. Poor Yoshi had to stay in the hospital every night, but thanks to Dr. R who knows us how careful we are with Kai at home, he let us come back home a day before a mother’s day. Unfortunately, Kai’s immune level remains low, so he can not go to school. However, it is so much easier to be home.

While he was in the hospital, I came and spent my time there during the day. Whenever I left home though, I stopped by at someone’s houses to buy used baby items. I went to craigslist.org and within a few days, I got so many baby stuffs!!! However, even though buying them used, it really adds up when I have to buy more than one of everything. I ended up sending e-mails to my good friends. They are wonderful. Within a few days, now I got almost everything I need to be prepared for babies’ arrival! Most of my friends already have bigger kids, but some kept their baby stuffs in their storage, and never had a chance to get rid of them. We got those for free, plus some people are lending items as well.

I am relieved to be able to gather most of stuff now than later. I really do not know what my condition may be, and frankly speaking we do not have enough money to buy everything new. Yoshi, who does not care about or is not so used to paying attention to our finance, would just go out and get everything new. I do not want to deal with financial strain too much after babies’ births. I want to save some money for hiring nannies or night time nurse instead.

So far, I am doing OK. However, I am starting to have some physical changes. Now I sometimes have nerve shooting pain in one area of my tummy, plus on my left underarm. The nurse felt that it is due to my stretched skin. I am also starting to have fewer space in my tummy to eat. I really cannot eat a lot per each meals. I need to break down potions but eat more often, so that I still get enough calories, but still hard,,,,.

My weight gain is still minimal, only about 15 lb gain. My nutritionist is concerned, but I just cannot gain weight! It seems as if, by carrying triplets, I am carrying this huge weight and doing an exercise. My legs, thigh, and butt got firmer than before. If you look at me from the behind, you cannot tell that I am pregnant! So funny,,,,,.

24 weeks and 0 day, reacing to my first goal!!!

2007-05-08T09:04:00.000-07:00

Guess what? Today, I am @$,,upps! 24 WEEKS AND 0 DAY PREGNANT!!!!!! YEAH! I REACHED TO MY FIRST GOAL!!!

I am very happy, to have reached this far. From now on, what I need to focus on is buying more time. Each day adds to better chance of survival and less complications to our babies, so I should relax, take things easy, be a couch potato, and don't do much at all. I hope I can go on like this for at least another 4 weeks, my second goal, then 4 more weeks, until my major goal of 32 weeks pregnancy.

Kai¡Çs fever went down quickly, but his immune level continued to drop. Today, his white blood cell count is only 0.3th/mm3 (the count for normal people is 5.0th/mm3~10.0th/mm3, so he has very little white blood cells.) He also got blood transfusion today because his hemoglobin was low. Nonetheless, he is actually feeling pretty good. He has been spending his time with PC games, drawing, playing with hospital volunteers, and doing Japanese homework.

I am coming to the hospital from the morning until evening, and laying down on couch ALL THE TIME. I realized, in some ways, it is more relaxing to be here. I can ask nurse assistants to get cold water, Kai is content with his computer, books, and TV. Foods can be ordered from a hospital kitchen, and bathroom is only a few steps away. I have my own PC, so I have been spending lots of time reading some ad. on craigslist.org, to find good bargains for baby items. I already found a bassinet, a baby bath, a boppy pillow, and a Pali changing table to buy. All are in good prices so I feel great.

I hope Kai¡Çs count will come back up soon, so that he can go home and eventually get back to school soon.

23 weeks and 5 days, Kai got a fever,,,,

2007-05-06T09:00:00.000-07:00

It is almost 2am, and I cannot fall asleep because I took too long nap during the day.

Kai’s immune level and all other blood counts are declining. He is now extremely immune compromised, with low hemoglobin and platelet, requiring transfusions. He developed fever last night, and now he is in the hospital getting antibiotics via IV. Yoshi is staying with him now.

I am again, a bit stressed, and also frustrated. I cannot go stay with Kai because of my condition. In-laws are so worried about Kai, and feeling guilty about taking Kai to a Japanese restaurant last night. My father-in-law is already talking about staying in the hospital overnight for Kai, but I do not think he can handle the medical attention we have to take to Kai’s situation.. While I truly appreciate his eagerness to help us, it is also true that in some situation, he cannot handle it. I hate to have to explain it to him, because I know how disappointed he may feel to be declined of his help.

My mother-in-law is very worried about Kai, and repeatedly says to me how sorry she feels about Kai. I’ve had some problems with listening to this kind of comment. I think it is totally natural for anyone to feel so sorry for Kai, having to go through chemo, radiation, fever, hospitalization, etc. However, I just got to the point where focusing on pity does not help anything. Rather, I want to focus on then how we can support Kai in the hospital, and I do not even want to waste my time feeling so pitiful about him. While I totally understand her feeling toward Kai, I also feel bad about myself for not having a good amount of patience to listen to her.

What can I do now, to support Yoshi and Kai at this point????

Maybe,,, I should be more patient with in-laws, and listen to their feelings. OK, just like a counselor, that may be something I can try to do. Also, I should use my brain more, and figure out the best way to support Yoshi in the hospital. In the situation like this, what they need is a quiet time, not a lot of visits from us, but a minimal support such as meals. Yoshi will get very tired for the next few days, and his patience to me gets shorter. I should let him take in charge of everything in the hospital.

OK,,,finally,,,I am a little sleepy. My babies are moving like worms now. It feels so funny.

Oh,,, and I realized, as I was typing,,, today is my birthday! Happy birthday to me!

23 weeks and 3 days, growth ultrasound

2007-05-04T08:10:00.000-07:00

It has been a week since I am put on an official bed rest. I am really spending my time horizontally, either on a couch or in bed. While it does get tiring just to be in one position, it has definitely helped me recover from all the fatigue I had from the last three weeks of hectic medical schedule with Kai and me.

Yesterday, I had my growth ultrasound appointment. I was 23 weeks and 2 days pregnant. All the babies were growing well! Baby A, one of the identical girls, weighs approximately 1 lb, Baby B, another girl, weighs approximately 1 lb and 2 oz., and our Baby C, a boy luxuriously living in a single room (sac) with lots of room, weighs approximately 1 lb and 3 oz. All of them are within 35~42 percentiles. I am very pleased with their growth!

In addition, my cervix length improved after a week of rest. Now, it is 2.9cm (back from 2.3cm a week ago.) I am very relieved with this news, because I was prepared to have my cervix shortened more, and put into a hospital bed rest. This does not mean that my condition remains fine, so I still need to be resting a lot, but I am happy that so far it has been good.

I have only 4 days until my first goal, 24 weeks. Yesterday, my loving, caring primary OB, who was also co-managing my pregnancy, called me and told me that from now on I should be followed up only by Perinatologists because they specialize in high risk pregnancy. Now all the babies will be entering to a viable stage, so she feels it is better to be monitored only by them.

I must say,,, I have a mixed feeling about it because actually she took a better care of me with more conservative approach than my Perinatologists. Also, at my Peri’s office, I do not get to see the same doctor every time. My primary doctor Peri feels that from 20 weeks I should be seen every week. However, other doctors in the same practice tell me to come back in 2 to 3 weeks. Due to this discrepancy, I have to argue with a person who makes appointments when I should be seen.

I will insist being seen every week, but it is just so tiring to have to push everyone to be as conservative as I wish. Well,,, after more than two years of dealing with Kai’s treatment, I became very good at being assertive, or even insisting to get the kind of care I want. I will do my best to make sure that my pregnancy will be followed at the level and attention I want.

It has also been a week since Kai finished his radiation and chemo. His blood count (such as immune level, hemoglobin, platelets, etc) has been declining. I am a bit worried, because if it gets lower than now, he will not be able to go out side and have fun. I keep telling myself,,,, it is just like before,,, after a while his immune level will come back up. However, whenever his blood count is low, I get nervous. He is so immune compromised that he may get sick. I just cross my fingers that he will be fine and his count will recover soon.

22 weeks and 5 days, getting nervous

2007-04-29T08:06:00.000-07:00

It is only day 2 of my bed rest. I am already getting a little worried and bored at the same time.

Today is Sunday, but my DH, who came back from Japan for his business trip two days ago and still having some jet lug, had to wake up several times since 6 am due to Kai, who was hungry from steroid medication. He was sobbing when he woke up, so Yoshi had to get up and give him some buttered baguette. Yoshi got back to bed but then had to get up several more times to take care of Tomo in a bathroom, and eventually,,Kai in a bathroom. He was so sleepy, that he slept in until almost 12 noon.

I woke up at around 9 am, but went straight to a couch to rest. My in-laws were busy cooking spaghetti meat sauce, something that my FIL wanted to make in order to make Kai eat more vegetables. They spent all morning cooking it, and I was with kids. Kai was too tired and often laid down with me on a couch. As soon as Tomo sees us laying down together, he came and tried to squeeze into a space. As a result, we spent lots of time just laying down on this not so big couch. My tummy got pushed by them sometimes, getting tight as a result. I really did not like it,,,,.

Also this morning when I woke up, I felt some tightening of my tummy. I timed how often it is happening, and it was happening exactly every 15 minutes. It slowed down after I got up, drank tons of water, and ate my breakfast, but I really did not like that either. I even thought of going to a Labor and Delivery just to see if what I am feeling is a sign of pre-term labor, but I called my OB, and she told me that I am still OK resting at home, especially since the tightening slowed down after I drank more water. She told me to come to L & D if I am having contractions every 10 minutes or so. However, I must say,,,, with triplets, I think every 10 minutes of contraction is too close together to go to L & D. I doubted whether this on-call doctor really knows about multiple gestation pregnancy or not. I should call my Perinatologist instead tomorrow, and ask him what guideline I should follow when having some tightening of uterus.

I am a bit nervous. No,,, actually very nervous. I came this far, after all the bleeding and worries. I really want to keep the babies inside me longer. I have started to learn that my in-laws may be too old to take care of my kids. For example, this morning they spent more time cooking their meat sauce than looking after them. I would rather let them interact with kids, taking their attention away from me so that they do not climb on me, but I could not say so,,,,.

I need to call more friends to come visit me, so that my friends’ kids can play with mine. I guess I also need to keep some more of my mother’s helpers.

I am tired,,, and anxious.

22 weeks and 4 days, an official bed rest started

2007-04-28T08:02:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a busy day. First, Kai finally completed his craniospinal radiation treatment, and this awful, painful chemotherapy shot to his leg!!! I am so proud of him, and I am so relieved to know that now we do not have to drive to treatments every day. It was physically very tiring to do so for the last three weeks. I am so glad that now I will have more time to rest. Prior to today’s clinic visit, my MIL talked to FIL that it is better for him to excuse himself after I am there at an Pediatric Oncology clinic, so as soon as I arrived there he went back home. We had to spend two hours in a clinic after a shot. This time it was more relaxing, and quiet. I did not have to chat with my FIL, and both Kai and I rested a little bit.

On the same day, Yoshi finally came back from his business trip in Japan. I am so happy. He will not have to go on to another long trip for the next four weeks. By then, I hope our in-laws are more used to life here.

As if my cervix was waiting for this last day of Kai’s radiation therapy, I also found out yesterday that my cervix shortened rapidly. Now, it is only 2.3cm. Last week it was 3.0cm, and two weeks ago it was 3.5cm. These last three weeks of crazy life was probably a bit too much. At the same time, I am glad that my cervix held until now. I wish it could have held with better length a bit longer (so that I could enjoy a little bit of time for myself to go shopping, etc.) but I am glad that it held at least until the end of Kai’s hectic treatment. I cannot imagine not being able to be with him during this very hash treatment.

Now, I am officially on bed rest. I am allowed to shower, go to a bathroom, and also eat my meals sitting down, then for the rest of the time I am advices to be off my feet as much as possible. Although I did a modified bed rest earlier during my first trimester due to bleeding, at that time my pregnancy itself was still tentative in my mind. This time, since I am already 22 weeks and a half, I know, with a little bit more time, babies can be viable. Usually it is 24 weeks gestation as a turning point of survival. However, 24 weeks birth is still very risky to babies. I really, really hope that I can reach at least 28 weeks, and if possible, much longer, until 32 weeks or more. But for now, I hope to remain pregnant today, tomorrow, and beyond. One day at a time.

22w 1d,, already having a bit frustrated with FIL

2007-04-25T07:40:00.000-07:00

It has been 5 days since my in-laws came. Yoshi had to leave for his business trip to Japan since Monday. He will be back here on Friday.

To be honest, having in-laws is helpful in some ways, and but still a lot needs to be done by me. Yoshi’s mom is in charge of cooking and laundry, but still her mobility is not so great that I do a good share of cooking in the morning. However, she really knows her limit and role, so she has been wonderful.

Yoshi’s dad is in charge of driving and accompanying to Kai’s medical treatments. While it is greatly helpful for him to take Kai to radiation, but his driving is still,,, scary,,,, to me, and also,,, he has so many wishes and ideas that he wants to do, which in his mind is supposed to be helpful, but not necessarily so in reality. I need to be assertive, and sometimes very direct about what is working for us and what is not, and to be honest, it is a bit tiring,,,,.

For example, today after radiation, Yoshi’s dad took Kai to an Oncology clinic and I met them there. Since we have two cars, and we have to be there for two hours to observe Kai after his chemo shot, we had nothing to do. I told my father-in-law that he can now go back home because there is nothing to do for him. However, he said that he wanted to stay with Kai. So,,, we were stuck in a small clinic room, three of us, with Kai feeling so exhausted from chemo and feeling grumpy.

Still, Kai decided to do a Japanese homework, so I helped him do so while he was still laying down, and I was next to him showing his homework. Then,,, my FIL was standing about a foot away, saying nothing, and watching us work on his homework. I do not know how to describe, but he was physically too close to us, which made both me and Kai uncomfortable.

Eventually, when Kai started doing Chinese Kanji homework, he had hard time remembering some Kanjis. Then suddenly, my FIL started to give us a lecture about what is the best way to memorize Kanji, and the way I was doing does not help him. I had to assert myself and tell him that, while what he say may be true, in reality, Kai just does not have any energy and willingness to listen do his lecture and do the homework in the way he suggested. While telling it to him, Kai got frustrated, and eventually got upset that he is too disturbed and cannot rest enough.

At night, my FIL wanted to tell a story to kids, but again, Kai was very tired from steroid medication, and he was barely able to keep his eyes open. I told FIL that tonight Kai seems too tired to listen, so it is better to skip a story telling, so that he can just go to bed. Although I told him, a second later, he asked kids, “Do you want a story? Yes? No? Let’s just do it a little bit,,,.” Then he started to tell the story. Kai was not smiling at all, so tired, but did not have energy to even say anything. I wondered,,, why he cannot see the condition of Kai. Obviously he was not enjoying the story. He just wanted to sleep!!! After brushing Tomo’s teeth, I interrupted the story, saying that” OK! The rest of the story is told tomorrow!” then cut it out.

Also today, Yoshi’s dad almost got into a car accident on the way to pick up Tomo from his day care. I was in a passenger seat, and Kai was in the back. He entered to a street without noticing a car coming from right. The up coming car barely stopped, almost hitting us, and I was screaming to him saying that, danger, danger, danger!!!! But he still never stopped and entered to the lane. What is more scary is that,,, after avoiding accident barely, he still did not even realize that he was almost getting hit,,,,. I was shaky and very upset. I could have been hit severely, and my pregnancy could have been ended by it.

I decided to prohibit him from using today’s route to go pick up Tomo from his day care. Instead, I decided to teach him another route, which takes longer, but have signals on each intersections, and only involves right turns, so that he does not have to cross the lane to turn,,,,.

I has been only 5 days since they came, but I feel so shaky now,,,,. How can I be a good boss so that I can make sure that they can be helpful??? I do not want to hurt their feelings but if it comes to the safety and health of my kids and me, I really need to be firm. I cannot sugar coat my words. I guess I need to be very direct to my FIL what is working and what is not. I will try my best.

Meanwhile,,,, I am doing OK. I passed 22 weeks gestation! Yesterday was my appointment with Peri, and it went well. Kai wanted to come with me, so I took him to a clinic too. When the doctor walked into a room, it was Kai laying on an examine table because he has fatigue from chemo and radiation. I explained to the doctor what Kai is currently going through. After the Peri saw Kai wearing Oakland A’s baseball hat, he gave me two tickets to a baseball game, between Oakland A’s and Seattle Mariners!! He told me to make it as a surprise, so Kai still does not know where we may be going tomorrow, but we are going to see the game, Ichiro, and Johjima, two Japanese players in Seattle Mariners!!! Our seats are on the very first row on the first base side! If we are lucky, we may be able to get some autographs!! If you see an Asian pregnant woman, with a bit chubby Asian boy waving their hats to get autographs at tomorrow’s game, it will be us!!!

The thought of whether I need to be on the bed rest or not ran in my mind,,, but then I justified my doubt by telling me that,,, well,,, my Perinatologist, who handles high risk pregnancy, gave me these tickets to go, so I should still be able to go watch the game. I will be very careful though, and bring lots of water with me!

20 weeks 6 days, and doing well.

2007-04-16T20:25:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow, I will be 21 weeks pregnant. I am so blessed with it. It takes only 11 weeks until my goal of 32 weeks gestation! I hope I can reach there without much complication.

Last week and this week have been very busy, mainly due to Kai’s treatment. Last week he had a clinic visit 4 times a week, and I have my own visits twice a week, meaning that on one day, we had to deal with two different doctors’ appointments. This week is even more hectic, as Kai started Radiation therapy, which takes place everyday, and he also has an Oncology Clinic visits three times a day. I also have two medical appointments for myself too. Scheduling and gaggling everything is so tricky, but somehow we have been managing to go to all the appointments.

Last week, I had Level II Ultrasound, and everything was well! Non of them had any visible problems through ultrasound, and their size seemed right on target. They all had enough fluids around them too! I am so happy about it.

I also had my appointment with my primary Perinatologist. I asked him whether I need to impose any types of bed rest now. He said I can just take my day easy (which is the toughest thing to do for me now with Kai’s treatment), and I do not need to be an official bed rest. I asked him about steroid shot ( to enhance the growth of lungs of babies), and he said that I will probably get it at around 24 weeks. If everything is well without any complication, I remain going to see my Peri and my primary OB in each alternative week.

I never imagined that I will be doing this well now, after so many bleeding early on, with types of triplet I carry (one set of identical twins and one singleton), and with my past history of easily shortened cervix. My cervix last Thursday was still 3.5cm. I am so thankful for it.

On the other hand, I feel that I am definitely getting into an unknown territory. This pregnancy is more like a fast forwarding of my past pregnancies. My tummy is now soooo huge, to the size of full term pregnancy with Kai and Tomo. I still have a lot more weeks to go. I just do not know how big I will be like! We will see,,,,.

19 weeks and 5 days, cervix check up went well

2007-04-09T20:24:00.000-07:00

Relaxing Sunday. Kids are out with Yoshi to buy a cell phone for Yoshi’s parents, who will be coming from Japan to help us in a few weeks. We also bought a TOTO Washlet, an innovative toilet seat which can clean your private part. It is very popular in Japan and they said that they cannot live without it,,,. We need to arrange an electrician so that they can put a new outlet for it too. Still a lot to do! They will stay with us for 5 months, to help us manage Kai’s doctor visits, my doctors and ultrasound visits, and housework too.

On last Thursday, I went to another ultrasound to measure my cervix. To my surprise, my cervix length went from 3.1cm last week to 3.5cm! I am very glad, because I was prepared to be put onto more restricted rest. For now, I can take my day easy, but still allowed to do simple cooking.

In two days, I will be 20 weeks! I am so happy!!! I had so many complications early on, so that 20 weeks mark seemed so far away! Now I look more like 7 months pregnant with singleton. I wonder how much I will expand in the next 10~15 weeks or so. So unimaginable!!

Triplets live in Kai and Tomo’s mind a lot too. Yoshi’s parents went to a shrine in Asakusa, Tokyo to pray for a safe, easy birth of triplets, and they sent us a little ofuda, a talisman issued by Shinto shrine. We put it on the wall in our family room, where we eat our meals. Every day, my kids bow twice, clap hands twice, and bow one more time again to ofuda, to pray for safe pregnancy and arrival of triplets. I often forget this practice, but they remember it well and remind me to do it too. The way they do it is so cute!

A few nights ago, Tomo came out of the bedroom, and asked me if he could talk to Omochi-chan (our triplet), so I showed my tummy to him. He gently touched it, and whispered to the baby, saying, “ I will be waiting for you, so,,, please be alive.” Later Kai came and did the same. The gesture was gentle, and so kind of them to care about triplets.

19 weeks today!

2007-04-03T20:22:00.000-07:00

Well,,, days go by, thankfully, without any surprises or complication (yet!). I am so grateful that I am as of today 19 weeks pregnant, only 5 more weeks until my first goal of 24 weeks gestation age. While some triplet pregnant moms may still feel fine about moving around, I am laying down as much as possible, partly because it is recommended by many other experienced triplet moms, but also because I get tired so easily. My heart pounds fast if I am rushing to do things even ever slightly, such as preparing Kai’s lunch box in the morning or cooking dinner. I just have to lay down so that it stops.

Since I am now the second trimester, (or for triplet pregnancy, almost the end of the second trimester?) I am trying my best to read a book recommended to me, “When you are expecting twing, triplets, and quads”. I am trying my best but still I am only half way done. I want to read more books about preterm labor, bed rest, and of course, preemies but I am still dealing with so many insurance disputes from previous IVF and Kai’s treatment, and focusing more on resting, I do not have much time to read. Interestingly, when I am trying to read and if Tomo finds me, he comes up to me, takes away books or whatever I am reading at the time, and say “No more reading!” I take it as a sign from him to tell me that he wants attention, so I switch my book to his favorite books and we do reading time. Oh well,,,,. Hopefully, I will find more creative way of getting more information about my type of pregnancy!

Out of sense of being so unprepared, I posted a question about what I may need now, should have, or do at Triplet Connection web forum site, a web site for triplet parents. I have received lots of great suggestions and advices from many people. I felt so much supported and easier by reading and learning about what I may be able to do now. I still have not been able to reply to each people’s post, but I value everything they told me, from planning on paper about what I need now first, to not to buy baby bottles yet. I was surprised to learn that for the first month, all three of them may even be able to sleep in one same crib, co-sleeping! It will be so cute to see them all together. Someone suggested starting to read a book about scheduling baby’s sleep. For triplet parents, it must be well scheduled, so that they can gain some sleep.

Wow,,, I started to feel again that I have so much to learn!

Note about Kai: Kai finished long, hard, and intense one year of heavy duty chemo phase. From this Friday, he will move onto radiation treatment, as well as miler chemo. I just cannot believe that we survived one whole year with such an intensive treatment. Kai did so well, and I am so proud of him! I know that radiation will probably give him late cognitive learning difficulty, but that becomes an issue for him only if he can be alive, so I am happy to have him go through this treatment and deal with learning issue, than not doing this and risk another relapse of his leukemia.

18w1d cervix check-up

2007-03-28T20:18:00.000-07:00

Day 3 without DH. He is now in Japan.

I went to bed at 9pm with kids last night, hoping that good rest will help me survive today. This morning, though, as I was rushing to pack lunch for Kai, I had a bite of a piece of apple, and immediately I had a reflux. Yuck. My heart was also pounding fast too from moving too much. I thought,,, let's forget the idea of bringing kids on time to schools, and take it easy. That helped. Kids were late for school, but my morning was more relaxing.

I had a cervix length check-up scheduled today just before lunch, so I was planning to rest as much as possible. However, Kai called up from school complaining that the site of his catheter on his chest is itchy. Since I needed to go to Kai's school to give him medication before my appointment, I also brought all the supply to change dressing for Kai's catheter. I could rest only 20 minutes before I headed to school, but 20 minutes was better than nothing, right? Kai basically scratched the itchy part so badly that its skin was peeling. I changed his dressing at school, gave him a medication, and then headed to my appointment.

Overall, today's appointment was good! The ultrasound technician let me hear the heart beat of babies, and it was very reassuring. She had very hard time measuring my cervix via transvaginal ultrasound, because, from what she said, our babies are being so low and close to my cervix. She tried to tilt the bed so that the weight of the babies will be sifted, and finally she got a measurement.

3.1cm long. Yeah. Still within normal. However, last week it was 3.5cm long, and two weeks ago it was 3.9cm long, so it is definitely getting thinner. Scary!

In spite of my worry, the doctor said that I can come back in two weeks for another cervix check-up, along with my level II ultrasound. I asked the doctor if it is still OK for me to have my cervix checked next week because I already have an appointment for that, and it also provides me a peace of mind. I explained to him that weekly cervix is serving me as a tranquilizer. He smiled and said it is OK.

Now back home, after one hour nap, kids are back, and Kai's friend is also here. I am laying down on sofa, watching them happily moving all of our chairs and comforters into a living room saying that "We are going to build a fort!" Quite a mess, but good to see happy kids.

Journey to triplet nursery,, (Kai made this title.)

2007-03-27T20:11:00.000-07:00

(Moved from another blog.)

This is my diary to keep track of my triplet pregnancy. I am sure, after a while, even remembering what I did that day will become hard, so I want to use this place to remember what this unique pregnancy is like.

Let me introduce our family. My DH and I already have two sons, 8 years old and 4 years old. Our 8 years old, Kai, is very a funny, active, cheerful, and kind guy, who also unfortunately has Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (ALL). He was diagnosed when he was only 5 years and a half. He was put onto a Standard Risk protocol, but unfortunately his leukemia came back on his 7th birthday to his central nervous systems. Since then, he is in another protocol specifically designed for central nervous system relapsed ALL. In a few weeks, he will complete his initial one year of very intensive chemotherapy treatment. I must say,,, it has been hard to go through this phase, with about twenty inpatient hospitalizations with chemo and fever, more than 20 spinal pokes, and many days of severely immune compromised condition and not being able to go outside. Still, we survived so far, with lots of help from friends, and we feel so lucky to be surrounded with such wonderful people.

Our 4 years old, Tomo, meaning a friend in Japanese, is our healthiest person, but at the same time, very unique to my eyes. He has very good eyes to details, and always observing his surroundings. He is the best person to find my cloths in my DH’s closet. He can just pick and say, “Hey mom, your cloth is in daddy’s closet, and it should not be there.” He also loves mazes, and spends long time doing complicated mazes. He also loves numbers, and plays a lot with addition, using his hands. He loves to also look at the sunset and see what colors he can find in the sky. He is poetic, yet very mysterious in some way. Of course, he is a boy, so he loves to be goofy and silly, and runs around the house with my older one.

While Kai was going through very intensive chemo, we tried to do IVF, after one year of trying to conceive without success. We wanted to have another sibling, to make our lives crazier and more interesting, and also in hope to conceive a child with the same bone marrow type from Kai, so that the new baby can become a donor in case Kai needs bone marrow transplant. We tried three IVF, and in middle of December, I found myself pregnant!

Today, I am exactly 18 weeks 0 day. I am so thankful that I have reached this far so far. Up until this point, I had bleeding from week 4 to week 7, and then bled again heavily from week 12 to almost last week. I also had a scare of premature rapture of membrane, which turned out to be night time peeing accident, embarrassingly but luckily. I am now dealing gestational diabetes, but it has been able to be controlled by diets. I need to check my glucose level four times a day, but it is still manageable.

My triplet pregnancy is a set of identical girls and a singleton boy. Early on, we were given an option of selective reduction. For several weeks, we read papers, web sites, and consulted with professionals. What the doctor was worried about was of course preterm labor from triplet pregnancy. Also, because we have identical twins I also had a risk of having twin to twin syndrome, which can end my pregnancy. It was hard to decide. We really wanted to have a safe birth, so that we can keep cord blood of the baby to be possibly used for stem cell transplant for Kai, if needed. However, doctor was suggesting us to reduce identical twins and keep a singleton, and the reduction itself had about 15% of the risk of losing all the pregnancy. It would be truly devastating to reduce, only to find out that we lost the baby, and have to start all over again with IVF.

However, the risks that the doctor was worried about happening was all about 10~20% range, meaning that about 80~90% of the time I will not have any risks of twin to twin syndrome, or other complications. It was actually much better than Kai’s 4 years Event Free Survival rate. I felt, if we can live with Kai’s prognosis, I should be able to deal with the risks associated with this triplet pregnancy. So,,, on week 14, we decided to keep all three of them.

After deciding, we visited two Perinatologists’ offices. One is in San Francisco, with a good doctor, great on-call nurse system, but far away over the Bay Bridge. The other one is in the East Bay, only 10 minutes to Kai’s hospital, but limited on-call support and slightly chaotic office. After thinking a lot about which one is better for me, I decided to stay with a doctor in the East Bay, close to Kai’s hospital. Although the doctor I saw several time did not impress me much, I feel, so far, it is OK. Also, it is so close to Kai’s oncology clinic and hospital, that sometimes I can just take Kai for impatient stay, but ask nurses to look after him and go to my appointments directly from the hospital. I am also co-managed by my OB, who knows my personality well and also my preference to a kind of medical care I want. She talked to my primary Peri., explained about me, and she and my Peri arranged the very conservative monitoring schedule of my pregnancy. Now, already, I see either Perinatologist or OB every week, and also have a cervix length check-up by ultrasound weekly. I am also on weekly special progesterone shots to prevent preterm labor. It has been hustle to have to go to medical offices at least three times a day already (two for me and one for Kai) but it is working out great.

Yesterday, however, was not an exiting day. I met a Peri, who is not my primary one. He walked into a room, answered my questions, and measured my tummy, and that was it! He did not even listen to my babies’ heartbeat. I was disappointed, but I did not push him to use a Doppler to listen to the babies because I left Kai at the hospital. He had been inpatient from 3 days ago for chemotherapy. I wanted to get back to the hospital soon. Also, I will have ultrasound check-up of cervix tomorrow, so I can see the heart beats more accurately there.

So far, my gestational diabetes is being OK only with diet control. The nutritionist said that I am doing well, which is a good news.

Wow,,, my first entry got long~! I will try to keep it short from the next time.